Blog from 2006

12/23/2006 Saturday Today was a wonderfully unproductive day that had almost nothing to do with art. Yes, the guilt meter ran up a bit, as I am wont to do, but I muddled through. I guess the only artistic activity of the day was to sketch out the design for my Christmas card, renamed my "Holiday" card, or New Years card. Well, my philosophy on it that people don't seem to complain when they are getting a custom made card from someone. I really enjoy making a real Christmas card. Imagine if everyone had time to make their own card? Wouldn't those envelopes become so precious? Artwork from everyone? Why not let your kids, or even a neighbor's kids, make a card for you, then take it to the copier and make as many as you need. Couldn't cost much more than you've paid this year for those Hallmark cards. Think about it for next year. I'll post my card on here after I send it out. Please forgive me if you don't get a personal copy, my mailing list sometimes hides from me.

    The studio was calling out to me today, but somehow I ignored it again. I also want to get a jump on my taxes, get all the numbers in hand, maybe even get them started when the forms come in the mail. Done with it in January? That would be a completely new feeling for me. Don't tell me you do it every year, I don't want to hear about it. Just the same, don't hold your breath. It wasn't at the top of my New Years resolutions. 

    What the Bleep  has been amazing, even the second time! I'm going to sit down and watch some more of it tonight. Merry Christmas!

12/22/2006 Friday It's been a while since I've been on my Blog, and that's because I have been on hiatus, a mental vacation, out of the studio, recharging my batteries, getting centered, being slow and lazy, taking naps, sleeping in, fasting, eating well, being kind to myself. That sure sounds silly in our Puritanical society. Being kind to myself. It's hard to admit coming from a hardworking family. Idle hands. . . . 

    This is the time that I take off, to some degree, so that I can get back into the studio later with renewed vigor, the time that balances the extreme energy of the rest of the year. Balance is something that a friend of mine often talks of, but I realize how much I could benefit from observing my own balance. The other day I thought of it as two rails of a train track. It's pretty hard work to try to run on one rail. The other rail is how I treat myself. Work never ends, so I have to schedule and stop and take time for myself. The other day I took an afternoon to finish a book. It felt so decadent from a guilt point of view, but it was nice, very nice, to take the time to allow my mind to sink into something else for a couple hours.

    Even with this sense of setting aside this time to relax and let go, I still see all the projects and work to-do like balls hanging over my head. Stop that! OK, so now I've set the balls down for a while.

    I rented What the Bleep: Down the Rabbit Hole,  the sequel to  What the Bleep Do We Know?  For those unfamiliar with the film, it's an exploration of the science of quantum mechanics and how it has such powerful implications to what and how we think in our everyday lives. Our thoughts are so powerful, and the second movie gives real insight to the ways that they affect the world. I stopped the video because it became a bit overwhelming., and I wanted to take some time away from it. To think about how the existence of all things is everywhere and nowhere at once, until we observe it. So my mind says, well, then if I choose my thoughts before I observe, I can decide what will show up when I observe. Sure, that's over simplistic, maybe, but it may actually be possible, from the science point of view. To think about how our minds can actually go back in time to do things! So if we can do that with everyday things, why can't we do that with intention? If I am not attached to the results, this leaves me feeling very powerful and hopeful at what I can do with my life. After all, the placebo effect is our mind's power over our body, prayer has been demonstrated to have power over other people's bodies, the baseball player can go back in time to swing at the ball. The biggest limitation may be our own minds and beliefs. If we belief it's not possible, then it won't be, just like the Native Americans who were first visited by Columbus: they couldn't see the ships because they didn't have any experience with ships. 

    You'll have to get the movie. 

    It reminds me a little of the book The Elegant Universe: Superstrings, Hidden Dimensions, and the Quest for the Ultimate Theory  that explains the science and implications of the deepest levels of existence. That was another book that I had to set down at times because the concepts would hit me with such impossibility and implications that I had to absorb it before I could take any more into my little head. Such as all the parallel universes that could have started out with different dimensions than ours, because ours has 11 dimensions, 7 of which we are not operating in. Chew on that. 

    This week I read a book that a friend gave me that was a biography, The Last American Man. A very interesting story of a man who could live off the land in any situation, and wanted the world to do the same. The book pointed out the evolution of this man through the anthropological ages of humankind. The thing I could identify with was his burning desire to help many people to see the beauty of this world as an organism that is fully willing to sustain us. That passion to teach is part of me these days. I just read a passage about that desire to help others possibly being about the ego desiring significance in the eye of the public. Because the quiet life lived fully might have just as powerful an effect on the world, we may be more beneficial to the world without beating that loud drum. And then bringing the quantum mechanics to it, I see that our own mind in pure bliss of creating our world has so much more power than trying to create someone else's world for them. The physical world has the least energy at its disposal (chemical versus nuclear), but the quantum field has trillions times the power my physical world. If I can effect the quantum level with my joy, would that be more powerful and effective? Infective? 

    I just realized the juxtaposition of those two books, yet I am able to make sense of them from the perspective of each. How can I integrate such disparate environments? 

    California Nature Preserve in Cincinnati was totally amazing last Saturday. It was one of the few times in my life when I felt totally in the Now. The trees and vines and ground seemed to shimmer with vibration that went right through me. I sat on a bench for I don't know how long, totally content, almost turned to stone with the contentment of the moment. I'm looking forward to heading up to Highlands Nature Preserve next week to end the year in nature. I'm very grateful and glad that I live in a place that I can access so much nature so easily, including at my home. It is such an innate part of me, such a connection that I feel I need to replenish constantly. And hence my art. 

    I have a love for rocks. Rocks from the creek. Rocks in mountains. They feel so rich and powerful to me. The irony was not lost on me when I realized that my pottery is essentially ground rocks re-melted to new forms and textures, just as all rocks in nature are. Artists spend so much time imitating nature, or at least following the same path of so many: Observing our environment and then reassembling it in a way that makes sense to us. I'm curious how the concepts of quantum mechanics will creep into my work. I can already see one possibility. . . 

    I am anxious to get started on the pieces for my dear France Patrons who supported my exchange with Nancy, France. 

12/12/2006 Tonight I got together in Versailles with the Kentucky Guild for a wonderful social event. It was great to get together with people who care about art & craft! The rest of the day was spent on getting ready for the Carnegie show and making deliveries. 

    I think I am still recovering from the shows. Tomorrow I'm going to sleep in, no alarm. It really takes a while to recover from the culture shock. if that's what I can call it. I mean, think about it, I spend all my time in my quiet little studio making loud but silent pottery, and then I go set up a store in a big convention center and talk to potential collectors all day, if I'm lucky, and look forward to taking bags of money home. Thanks God I don't attach myself to the results of the fair, in part due to the great attitude of my friend Ray Bridewell. He kept things in perspective. And Jennifer McLamb was able to lighten the scene whenever she was around. It was actually a good weekend at Columbus because I learned so much about myself and my business and my attitude. I am a very lucky man to still be making art for a living. 

    Since I started working out in the gym three weeks ago, I feel like I could do this a long time. For a while, I was wondering how long my body could keep this up. But now I am confident that I can maintain a healthy body for many decades to come. If I want. But there is the teaching. Who knows what the future brings. I want to keep in mind the chapter I read today that pointed out that there are some things we do for others and some we do for ourselves. Tune into what is mine, not theirs.

    I want to send a think you to all the customers who came to the shows the past few weeks and shared your abundance with me. I am grateful for the fact that you appreciate great art, and that I can share my energy with you. And thanks to all the galleries and craft shops that have welcomed my art into their places to sell. I am honored to be a part of your success. So many shops that I was unable to completely fill all their orders, and I am almost drained of art work. 

11/27/06 Sunday after Winterfair Cincinnati. Beat as always, though I felt I didn't wear myself out as much during the show. But the day started at 8:15 in the studio glazing and then loading the whole kiln for a firing tomorrow. That kiln will get unloaded before I leave for Winterfair Columbus on Wednesday, and packed for sales and some packed for wholesale orders to galleries in New York, Milwaukee, Alabama, etc. Great to be so busy. So the show at Winterfair started at Noon.

    Winterfair Cincy lost a lot of traffic to beautiful weather. Hell, if I didn't have to be there, I would have been out hiking or doing something on this beautiful weekend, something besides being inside a big windowless building. Who can fault anyone for that? I hope you got to spend the weekend enjoying the last of the good weather, one of the warmest days this late in the fall. How about writing me back and letting me know what you did with your time? Just click on my email larry@watsonclay.com and send me a note!

    I had fixed a Thanksgiving dinner for the artists who were from out of town for Winterfair Cincy. again this year, but out of 13 invitations, no one showed up. They were all very grateful for the invitation, but were too tired after the setup on Thanksgiving day to drive out to my house. Next year I will do it on Saturday and make a party of it. That sounds like a plan that will work. 

    The fact is that I was very happy making up the map and directions, inviting all these strangers (about 20% of the people asked said they would come out) and being on the receiving end of their gratitude for being asked.  I really enjoyed fixing the food, and  thinking that all these people would be coming to my house. The disappointment started about 6:30, which was the time that I said dinner would be served. But I wasn't really that disappointed because I had had so much fun up to that point. And the food was really good. An orange basted turkey baked in a bag, tender enough for cutting with a fork; sausage and celery dressing, mashed sweet potato and rutabaga, green beans with bacon, cranberry relish, and my Mom brought an awesome pumpkin pie. I'm eating real good all weekend with that menu. And I'm a good cook. Which, according to some women, makes me a good catch. Ha! Every fish has some scales. And that's OK. 

    It was a very good weekend. Why? Because I wanted it that way. I thought about how hectic the tear-down after the fair always is, as if it were a competitive sport, it seems, and so I remember my brother saying, "are we having fun yet?" I thought that we were, because I choose to make it fun. I just can choose it. So it was. I was tired, and hungry, which is normally a bad combination for me, but I was looking at how fortunate I am to be working at my own business, around wonderful people, and even trading for artwork that I can take home. It's a good life. A charmed life. A fabulous life. A life to be envied. In any other job, I would be wistfully looking at it as a dream. 

Your dream can be put aside.

And you can get second best

but you can never get enough

        David Wilcox

11-20-2006 8:30 and the kiln is fired. This kiln was packed very tight, and it fired very well, very even, rather smoothly. That's a plus. Down to the wire for all the shows and all the orders to be shipped for the season. I think I'll be in good shape. 

    It's amazing how I can get to thinking that it is just a matter of getting the last of the firings done, and then I'm home free. But there is plenty more to do for me. I will be glazing some work tomorrow, getting the van packed, boxes packed. I can see there are several things I didn't get done this week, like getting a new sign for the booth, working on my booth display some more. Well, there are two more days before setup, and fixing a turkey diner in there as well. I have a very full life! 

    Saturday I had the great fortune to present to non-profit organizations a workshop on board training and governance. I was so happy to see 24 people who wanted to know how to run their boards better! I didn't realize how much I had learned about board governance and how a board runs an organization. I was excited about getting these wonderful people, who want to make a difference in the arts, to see how their role is so much easier when they understand what they are supposed to do, and how to do it. They all seemed a bit energized and ready to do some work. I went home so energized it took a while to actually settle down. But by 9:00 I was ready for bed.

    Sunday I got to enjoy a wonderful Thanksgiving meal at Unity. The place was packed with friends and to-be-friends, and the food was catered turkey with potluck everything else. Sweet. Potatoes. I stopped at the gym and really had a good workout, which I am feeling today. I feel so much energy from working out, and I mean all through the week. I can feel it when I walk up to the studio, I can feel it in my stamina through the day, the energy I have. It's great. I hope I never stop going. 

    Looking out my front window this morning, I was, again, stunned by the color palette that is part of fall changes. The sun has such a strafing angle at the grasses in the field just across the road, and the weed stalks from so many wildflowers side lit by the morning sun in yellows and oranges, stark against the green that ranges from bright, to soft and muted, to deep Kelly in the shadows. 

     I stepped to the window to take in more of the scene, but as I did, I am reminded of the Japanese garden theory that one should allow only a piece of the garden to be seen at one time. Especially for those grand vistas from hilltops, they will plant numerous trees and shrubs and grasses so that the grand vista is only glimpsed from time to time, or seen when bending over the fountain for a drink. 

    I stepped back from the window and let it frame the scene for me, to narrow down my vision to this rectangle, this tableau, this composition. So the window is actually a camera lens, the rectangle the film frame that captures the elements of this scene and freezes it into visual poetry. Poetry can go on forever, but it is the exact science of "enough" that makes the poem exactly what it is, and the same for  a photograph. Or a mental snapshot. The snapshot is a miniature that includes some of the world but can only intimate the rest that is not seen. Yet it is a complete picture. 

    While looking through the window frame, I cannot see the sun, but it is there spotlighting the hillside. I cannot see the rest of the woods at the top of the hill, but the trees I can see lead right to those oaks. The house is out of sight, but the driveway leads to it. The field is devoid of man, but a man mowed it in the summer. Twice. Brilliant  orange butterfly plants are no longer carpeting this field in blazing August sunshine, but the dried stalks paint their warmth in my mind. 

    How many other parts of my life are just hints of the true nature of it?

11-14-2006 PM I went to a Poetry Square (as opposed to a Poetry Slam- too violent and competitive) tonight and was able to recite some of my poems. I liked being able to share my work with other people, to say my writing out loud. I think that's the way it is meant to be done, at least my poems. I'm very conscious of the sounds of the words as much as the meaning, when I write, and the rhythm of speech is part of the finished piece also. Most, if not all of my work is in this Blog at some point or other. 

    The Poetry Square was at a nature center in Cincinnati, so the themes of the poetry was supposed to be nature. That's pretty much the gist of most of my work, so it wasn't hard. I really liked that it wasn't a bunch of "poets", but more based on an interest, a common passion. That made it easy. 

    I wasn't able to finish the teapots today, but I got the mini pitchers finished before I left. The bisque kiln is fired, and we'll unload and glaze on Thursday, before I go to the symphony. Someone was kind enough to offer me free tickets! Now that I've heard Parvo once, I am very happy to go back. That guy really knows how to bring a piece of music to life, to it's fullest potential. I can almost hear him at other people's concerts wanting to goose it up a bit. I'm looking forward to it. 

AM: Last weekend I didn't work hardly at all, just some paperwork. I realize that it will be my last weekend off for the next five weeks. Tis the season. Hopefully it will be a series of very successful shows. The work I am doing is certainly up and above par. It amazes me how my work keeps getting better. I loaded the kiln yesterday for the first bisque firing, and Thursday I will reload it and fire it again on Friday while I glaze. On Sunday I will unload the second bisque and load a glaze for firing on Monday. On Wednesday I will I unload it to pack for Thursday, and reload it with another glaze firing to fire on the Monday after Winterfair in Covington. The following Wednesday I will unload the kiln, pack my boxes, and head off to Columbus for five days. I can collapse after that until the Carnegie show. 

    This kiln load is packed. I have mugs, pitchers, teapots, casseroles, plates, moons, ikebanas, wine glasses, candlesticks, bowls, bowls, and more bowls, platters. . . The next firing I have a couple of two foot jars, some large pitchers that are fabulous, a couple jardienes, more plates, face teapots, cookie jars and pitchers. It was a busy week last week. I really cranked it out. But I still need more. Today while the kiln fires, I will be making mini teapots and mini pitchers, as well as some lids for the cookie jars. 

    I want to take a break in December, but I wonder if that is going to be possible. I have many more designs to make up for the face line, orders in January already, and I need to put together a new brochure for the wholesale orders that I want to jump on in January from the leads I got at New York. I decided to advertise in the Buyer's Guide, a national magazine for retail stores. 

11-10-2006 Every day I tell myself that I'll write tomorrow, tomorrow I'll have more time. But this has been the production week before the last firing of the year. Twelve hour days, and a major focus on clay. I've done almost two weeks worth of work in one week. Just ignore everything else, and keep at it. I guess I was lucky that I didn't have many other commitments this week. So much other stuff going on in the next couple weeks, I can't believe how fortunate I am that this week was somewhat slow. 

    I enjoyed the weather today, and took Rudy for a walk/run. I like to wind sprints sometimes, a way to get my legs in good shape, without the tedium of running continuous. It was a really good workout, and topped it off this evening with some yoga. That energized me so much I feel like I'm tingling, like electricity. Hope I can settle down for sleeping. 

    I find my mind on teaching a lot these days, trying to remember all of these great things to tell the students, ideas for assignments. I'm looking forward to all the energy that comes with such eager minds. I'm also teaching a workshop in January at a local studio, and I have ideas for more workshops for the year. It's when I really feel alive, teaching. I can make my own opportunities, I don't have to wait for someone else to ask me. 

11-3-2006 I couldn't resist the perfect night for a midnight walk under moonlight. Rudy and I donned the flashing arm bands for visibility on this little country road, and marched off into the sub-freezing temperatures and semi light of a full moon. The neighbors' obnoxious street lights didn't have a chance against this star studded night, and the moon had dominance the whole way. The cold night was crisp and biting on my face, portentous of nights to come in the real heart of winter. I am so grateful I have a warm home to go home to, a place I can be safe and warm and dry, where I can eat or drink, or sleep. I have books, and a computer to communicate with all of you, and a fabulous studio to create as I was designed. As you were designed. 

    I worked very diligently today, and yet I had greater designs than time to complete the work of the day. That's alright, tomorrow is Saturday, and that gives me another day to catch up with my production cycle. I was able to work on some more pitchers today, after completing a couple yesterday, and I finished and put handles on over a dozen mugs. I felt really good getting the work done, and sticking with the production schedule. With this new affirmation, it has really made it easier, liberated. 

    A week Tuesday, I have been invited to an open night at a nature center to bring some of my poems to present. It is a very informal setting, not even an event, but I am really thrilled to be able to present these poems that I have made over the years that have to do with the great place within which I work. Wish me luck.

11-1-2006 Today was a busy but fun day. I packed a few more orders to go out with the ones I packed yesterday and Monday, processed the shipping, entered and printed the invoices, sent DVDs of my interviews and demos. In the afternoon I was interviewed for a newspaper article, with photos. Then a ceramic artist came to my studio to look for an opportunity to work in clay in the US. She was from Slovakia, working here at a hotel on a work visa, but she wants to come back and work in clay. Actually, she has as much to offer me as I have to offer her, I believe. She really knows molds, but she has very limited throwing experience. Sounds like a good fit for both of us. We'll see what happens from here. 

    Then I went to the duplex to meet with a prospective tenant, who - guess what! - didn't show. But I spent an hour cleaning out the basement of garbage, and the sidewalk in front of the house was laden with many black bags of refuse and detritus (I just  love that word - detritus). When I left the house, somewhat bone weary from dragging some 50 pound bags up from the basement, I saw it was an hour before the 7:00 meeting, so I went to Lowe's and bought some paint and other things, and headed back to Cincy for the meeting on the December 8-10 sale at the Carnegie Art Center. It was nice to connect with some fellow artists and to plan an art event together. That is a powerful thing to do, to work together for a common purpose. 

    Earlier this week I made a wonderful transformation to a former obstacle in my life. Myself. My own thinking. See, I discovered through the Enneagram that, as a 7, I have a desire for choices and options. The result is that I have  a tendency to avoid finishing things because it appears to my twisted mind to limit my options! So I decided I needed to find a way to turn that very powerful obstacle into an ally, into a liberating power. So this affirmation came to mind: "My options multiply in the principle of prosperity with each project completed." It's amazing how much this has energized my week! I no longer feel like a ball and chain of reluctance dragging me down, slowing me with imagined handicaps. I have never felt more energy, almost to the point of hyperactivity at times. Then I wear myself out, and need a nap. But the nap doesn't last long, because I feel I have so much to do and accomplish. I remember the stories of Benjamin Franklin who only took naps, and never slept, and with this liberating affirmation, I can almost (no, not really, but almost) understand the unlimited energy and curiosity he must have had. 

    This is a pumpkin that I carved, with the inspiration from a web site: http://www.villafanestudios.com/pumpkins.htm I had a blast doing this carving, and it was so cool that he had used clay tools to make the carving. I emailed him with this picture,  and he said that my first attempt was better than his first try. Wasn't he nice? I carved it on Sunday while I was waiting for any stragglers to my studio sale.

    But Saturday was a wild day for the  kiln opening and studio sale! I had people from Lexington and Louisville, and all over Cincinnati, and my neighbors who saw me on TV. It was the most profitable weekend at my studio ever! I want to thank all of you who came, and to let those who stayed home know that you missed a really fun time! It was great having all these people swarming over the studio and the good deals, sometimes grabbing pieces to make sure they could get the one they wanted before someone else did. It happens like that! It was a great firing, and people came specifically for the firing. I just love sharing my passion with people.

    After packing all the orders this week (with a couple more to pack yet), I have very little stock left, at least not enough for the next show Thanksgiving weekend. I really need to crank it up and get the work out for the next three shows. I won't have enough time to make work during those three weeks, so I have to get it done now for those shows. And then I can relax. Right.

10-27-2006 Friday night before the big sale! A newspaper called today and hopes to come out tomorrow for the kiln opening. That would be nice! I'm looking forward to an unprecedented crowd of mad shoppers loading up shopping bags of pottery. Yes. Sweet.

    The firing went pretty well yesterday. After finishing the reduction aspect, it had not risen in temperature, and had actually fallen a bit. So I put the burners back up to full and went in the house for a half hour or so, and when I came out, one of the burners had shut off. Maybe a thermocouple, which would be the easiest culprit to fix. So I shut down, and this morning the cones were only a half cone off, which is very good. It was also even from top to bottom, which I am glad to have again. Now that the mouse nest is out of the flue. 

    I would love to sell a lot of the really nice seconds, or misfits as I call them. There is some really good stuff that just has minor flaws. 

    It was a really wet and slow day today, which really made it hard for me to get moving in the morning. I was pretty steady once I got going, and I really got into my stride in the late afternoon. It seemed almost a waste of good energy to expend it on paying bills, but those are just prosperity statements, anyway. I had a couple calls on the duplex, and it would be great to get that rented. Then again, that will take time to get it ready, and I feel so pressed for time for the shows. But I have two people willing to do the work for me, so it won't be that hard.  I will be putting out a call for some help in Columbus for the Winterfair up there in December. I don't think I can last four days by myself. Then again, why not. It's just hard work. 

    Tomorrow will be a great day for selling pottery, and I love seeing everyone out here. The chili is about ready, just plug in the crock pot. 

10-23-2006 Spent the day mixing glazes, unloading the kiln, waxing, glazing, and it went fairly well. I got everything lined, just about, and that's a good day. Tonight I will work on my sales tax quarterly report, and end up paying the late fee. 

    I put myself into this end of year lots-of-business frame of mind where it seems like there's no way I can get it all done. But somehow it works out, all the stores are restocked, I make enough work for all the shows that I'm doing, and I get a couple weeks to recover. But after all that, I still want to make the pieces for my France patrons who helped me get over there this summer. I hope I have some time in December or at least January to play in the clay, and make some work that's all about the trip. Lots of influences that I am aware of. 

10-22-2006 Sunday Walking the road at dawn, the flat light pre-sun lets colors mingle, and the rime-covered fence rails, thistle heads, and queen Anne's lace are warm in their frosted mauves and browns. The leaves seem to drip from the trees, and I want to paint them that way; thin leaves drooping over and elongating at their tips with melting caramel drops. The fence posts and thistles march steadily, in cadence with my solo footsteps. The sun rises to the hilltops, flaming the other side, lighting up the golds and browns like an ice cream cone, dancing colors on top of a table of earth tones.
    Yesterday, the sounds of late afternoon, a few birds calling, slowed my pace as well. The red-headed woodpecker clung to the side of the dead tree in kingly observation. I saw a rotted out locust for the first time, amazed at the fact that it's thin bark encrusted facade was still standing, then seeing that it was doing so by the grace of a neighbor tree. It wouldn't last long. A green, green, green grasshopper stops me and Rudy, the dog a bit more aggressive, until I pick the little critter up. It settles down into my hand, taking a taste of my skin into its finger-like mandibles. Mantis-slow movements of its incredibly thin and incredibly straight legs on a zeppelin sized body, with hooked feet pricking my hand, it inches across my palm, sending creepy sensations up my neurotransmitters, but the visual of those mandibles now directly grasping at my skin sends the critter reflexively flinging off into space and back to its forest of grass and cow vetch. 

View From My Front Yard (click on photo for larger image)  

    Today was Sunday, and I tried to do a lot of work, but it ended up being a couple hours. I took some time for myself yesterday and today, and it felt good to relax a little bit. I went to the creek and picked up my rocks that I had collected over the summer, and made some pikes in the yard. They end up being totems or markers, like the ones in Tibet. For me, they feel like wealth, maybe like piles of gold that are standing guard over me.

10-22-2006 Sunday Walking the road at dawn, the flat light pre-sun lets colors mingle, and the rime frosted fence rails, thistle heads, and queen Anne's lace are warm in their mauves and browns. The leaves seem to drip from the trees, and I want to paint them that way; thin leaves drooping over and elongating at their tips with melting caramel drops. The fence posts and thistles march steadily, in cadence with my solo footsteps. The sun rises to the hilltops, flaming the other side, lighting up the golds and browns like an ice cream cone, dancing colors on top of a table of earth tones.
    Yesterday, the sounds of late afternoon, a few birds calling, slowed my pace as well. The red-headed woodpecker clung to the side of the dead tree in kingly observation. I saw a rotted out locust for the first time, amazed at the fact that it's thin bark encrusted facade was still standing, then seeing that it was doing so by the grace of a neighbor tree. It wouldn't last long. A green green grasshopper stops me and Rudy, the dog a bit more aggressive, until I pick the little critter up. It settles down into my hand, taking a taste of my skin into its finger-like mandibles. Mantis-slow movements of its incredibly thin and incredibly straight legs on a zeppelin sized body, with hooked feet pricking my hand, it inches across my palm, sending creepy sensations up my neurotransmitters, but the visual of those mandibles now directly grasping at my skin sends the critter reflexively flinging off into space and back to its forest of grass and cow vetch. 

    Today was Sunday, and I tried to do a lot of work, but it ended up being a couple hours. I took some time for myself yesterday and today, and it felt good to relax a little bit. I went to the creek and picked up my rocks that I had collected over the summer, and made some piles in the yard. They end up being totems or markers, like the ones in Tibet. For me, they feel like wealth, maybe like piles of gold that are standing guard over me.

My New Booth at Ky. Guild Fair in Berea! (click for larger image)

10-8-2006 Sunday  

    The concerts were great. This was the best night, in my opinion, but then, I love the blues. Buddy Guy, Marcia Ball, The Blind Boys of Alabama, Buddy Guy, Dr. John, Olabelle, Buddy Guy. Yeah, he was amazing. I hadn't followed him or anything, I just enjoyed him when they played him on the radio. But he was a charismatic performer, and was a virtuoso on his guitars. I realized what a performer he was because when he came out into the audience, and he walked right by me, almost touching me, my heart was racing! What the . . .! I was amazed at my reaction, and then I watched as he drew people after him like moths to a flame. Truly, people were following him in a wake of awe struck faces, and it was the only time the entire set when people were not facing the stage. And he showed off by playing in the style of other guitarists. A woman was overheard saying, "Why would he play like Eric Clapton?" I thought to myself, because he wants to show how he can play Eric Clapton better than Eric Clapton, Jimi Hendrix better than Jimi Hendrix, and Jimmy Ray Vaughn better than Jimmy Ray Vaughn. Sweet.

    Such a beautiful day, and I only worked an hour or so, because I wanted to cut grass and get to the Tall Stacks music. Seven hours of concerts in one day, I felt my head pounding from the musical onslaught. The moon was a wonderful companion for the week, and the weather was fabulous, even the 40 degree nights. 

10-6-2006 1pm 

The sky is so blue, painters will have to invent a new color.

The trees are so green, they must be bleeding chlorophyll.

Some tress are golden, and they must have a pot of gold under their roots, and if I spent all day, I could dig it up if the leprechauns would let me.

The sun is so bright that there couldn't be a swimming pool big enough to hold all the light pouring down on me.

9amHyde Park went well, the new display was received favorably, but sales were not up to what I had hoped. It was a gorgeous day, there were thousands and thousands of people, but they weren't in a buying mood. Unfortunately, I heard that provincial battle cry, "Oh, you're local. . . " But there were a few who were interested in my large jars, and I plan on having more of those at the next few shows. 

    Mark your calendar for the 28th of October, that's when I'll have my fall Studio Sale and Kiln Opening. More to come.

    I had Philippe here for the past week,, and that was a delight. Sure took a lot of time and energy, but it's all good. 

    I went to Tall Stacks the past two nights, and plan on being there every day of the weekend. I wrote some stuff while I was there, and I'll put it in here:

Roseanne Cash sings "God is in the roses, . . . .and in the thorns."
The moon is a bright disc floating in a sea of gunmetal black cosmos. The tree I am sitting under provides shade from the cold street lamp casting a stark light on the prairie of human heads pressing the stage, spreading out across the ground as far as the eye can see. The streetlamp beats down through the trees stronger than the full moon, spattering mini spotlights through the October blown leaves, waving on the grass like the mirror ball at the dance. Puffs of clouds skitter across that blue-black sky like smoke from a gunmetal cannon, behind the rippling flag blown stiff in the autumn night wind.

    I have been offered a part time teaching position in the Spring, and I think I will take it. I love teaching too much to pass it up. 

    This quote keeps running through my head:

"Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are -- chaff and grain together -- certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath of kindness blow the rest away."

-- Dinah Mulock 

The great gift of this thought is that I can practice it on everyone I meet! But I think maybe even more importantly I can practice it on myself. It will certainly help in letting go of some of the self-judgment that I indulge in. What a gift you can give yourself, huh?

9-25-06  (click on photo to enlarge) I am really pleased with the new display that I am working on. I would love to say I am about finished, but that would be an illusion. Still some things to work out and to figure out. I didn't get to the hardware store for a couple small things left. I think the mirrors in the shadow boxes will be great. I think it will look good once I get it filled with work. It will be very nerve racking to not have a double booth  and to not have every piece of pottery out on the shelves. There will also be some pedestals out front, but these two 8 foot walls will be about it. 
    So you probably don't think about this part of the art fairs when you are there looking at their work. But that's good, that means the artists has done his/her job to present their work at its best. But from a business perspective, if the work isn't presented properly, the perception of quality may be missing. You might look at something and decide the artist is asking too much for the work, when it might be that the presentation subtracts from the actual value of the work. I think that was the case for my work. I know it has continued to improve and be among the best in the state (I have been asked to submit for an exhibit at the Kentucky Museum of Art and Craft that includes the "definitive clay artists of Kentucky"), and I put more and more time and skill into each piece, so I know the value. As Picasso said to a lady who demanded him to sketch her and then objected when his price was $5000, it didn't take me a few minutes to make the work, it took me a lifetime. Most other artists who know the amount of work and technique that I have in my work tell me my prices are too low. 

    Back to the display. I had a vision of this display for months now, and saw it at Summerfair in the booth of a glass artist. He said it really changed the way people looked at his work. I hope it does the same for me. I think I'll be refining it over the next few months, so that will give me time to get ready for Atlanta ACC show in March. 

    I am surprisingly enjoying this non-stop work week, I am actually excited about working to this end, the goal of prosperity. I have a real good attitude and enthusiasm for the work right now, and I am appreciating being so busy. This is what I have wanted, and so now I just apply myself. As long as I keep focused on the work, and not on the fact that it is work, then it doesn't seem like a lot of effort. Keep me rolling.

9-23-06 Saturday. Today I worked. There were a few things that I had semi-committed to, but I felt very pressured to get a lot of work done, considering all the projects and deadlines and extra-curricular activities coming up. With the Hyde Park show coming up on Sunday, I know I will have a hard time prepping for it while hosting my French artist. I do hope I am able to work a lot that week, because I need to get another kiln load in before the Guild fair. So I need to make a half kiln load by the end of next week. I am finally feeling like I can catch up with this schedule and the orders that I have promised. I have actually received a few more orders since New York, but I don't want to put any one off from an order. I'll try to do it all!

    I was very tempted to get the van and load it up with rocks. I went for a very aerobic walk and on the way back I was drooling over my stash of wonderful flagstone lining the creek that I have stockpiled over the past few weeks (see below), and I really wanted to harvest my (out) crop of rocks. I could visualize where each rock would go in the fountain or the patio expansion. 

    When the French artists are here, my hope is to treat them to a great American tradition: S'mores. I hope a couple of them will come out and enjoy a fire on the patio, and roast some marshmallows, have lots of chocolate for the graham crackers. Hopefully it won't be as cool as the forecast, especially for the Hyde Park show. 

9/20/06 Sitting on my stone bench out on the deck , the fire in the pit swirling lazy lacy smoke up in a pillar that dissipates into the stars both warm and  crisp in the night fall air. Sparks spit up on top of the heat column of flame, a flame swirling with yellow and blue. Looking  into the fire, I once again settle into the moment, letting all thoughts seep out the sides, and listen to the sounds of night and crickets and tree frogs and distant highway whines. I look into the fire and the mind wanders to other fires, times as a child staring into the campfires of two-week vacations, filled with days of hiking, playgrounds, and swimming-lots of swimming. (I am told that I would not go near the water until one day at the age of 5 I just got up off the blanket and walked in.) Driving back with all four of us on the tailgate of the station wagon, Mom freaking out over the safety factor, and Dad loving the idea of giving us this sense of freedom, almost spitting in the face of common sense, our feet touching the blacktop at low spots. Moving slow, but speeding into adolescence, speeding into school- but later. Now we were on vacation.

    OK. I settle into the moment again, letting go of all the worries and pressures, money, work, well being. OK. I settle into the moment again. There is nothing else, I am free of all, and now, with my new realization, my revelation, that when I am in my true self, my center, the physical world will continue, and maybe even flourish, while I take care of myself with doing not-doing. And here are the crickets and highway whine, and yellow and blue flames fallen to a bed of coals,  glowing into my face, wafting that glorious smoke essence into my head, that connection with those moments at the campfire with the family. 

    I told my boys once that when we look back on a precious moment, when everything seemed crystal clear, it wasn't so much that it was such a special moment, but that we were not thinking of anything else. We were in that moment only, that time of catching that silly little blue-gill, that dive off the high board. Nothing else was in our mind. Make that moment now. Sweet.

    Loaded the kiln today, after finishing glazing the rest of the work. I'll be up late tomorrow night, up early in the morning, firing the kiln. I was blessed with a visit from a troupe of Girl Scouts earning a badge in ceramics! I'm not sure if they appreciated my letting them know how much school taught me what I needed to know to do business. I told them that every subject I studied in school was being put to use as an artist. So I asked them to mention a subject in school, and I would tell them how I used it in my business. Math: bookkeeping, cost accounting. Reading:  communication. Spelling: communication. Science. I said, what are you studying in science? the planets. I said that the way our planet formed with its volcanoes and breakdown of its rocks is what gives me the clay that I make pots with, and the same science determines how they melt in the fire. Religion. Well, religion I'm not sure of that, but I didn't say that. I thought about the times when I was going to the same school they were attending, St Joseph's, and going to Mass every morning, and remembering that my favorite time was singing. I felt empowered to be a part of God when I was singing, and it reminds me of the line from Nelson Mandela's first inaugural speech: "We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone." 

    Is that what I am doing? I feel that way sometimes. There are times I wonder how long I will be able to make this art, and maybe I should look to something else to pay my mortgage, but I feel that I am making the most of what I have, and I am making manifest the glory of God in some humble and small way. I think I add something to some people's lives. Is that enough? Maybe. That and chocolate. Mmmmhh, chocolate.

    Are you making manifest the glory, all that you are potential? Are you singing? Got chocolate?

9/15/06     Here's a picture from the reception at the Krohn tonight, with our fountain in the forefront. They turned the water off for the program, so here's how it looks with the water on, as well. I highly recommend going to this exhibit because there is a lot of ceramic artwork integrated into the flowers. Sometimes they are very subtle, and you don't realize you are looking at a starling, or you look up in the lemon tree and see "stars" lit up inside. It's a great exhibit, and it's free, too! I'll be sending out a notice on it on email. 

    I also went to the Carnegie to see their silent auction. A nice collection of great work for the most part. As I went around, I was thinking of how we artists have a tendency to look for the next big thing, and that we hope it will be easy to make and to market. Sometimes someone stumbles on to the hot thing, and we all look with envy. I have a feeling that I am not going to be a hot trend, because trends don't really get me excited. I make art, which comes from inside, from my soul, from the passion I feel. I don't make art to be a designer. 

    So it occurred to me that this chase for the dollar can be consuming, take up more energy than its worth. What's worse, is that I keep wanting something easier, expecting something easier. And I came to the conclusion that it's hard work. Making art is hard work. We all wish it weren't so, and for some people it seems less consuming than others. Maybe they are the ones who just accept the work, and then take joy in what they get to do. Because I do love doing what I do, but sometimes I get tired. But is getting tired from such work a bad thing? it only seems so when I expect something else. The expectations are that it will get easier. I have a feeling that there are ways to make it easier, but all this whining can make it seem harder and harder. Hard work can be a cross to bare or it can be a source of joy. I can choose. Will I?

    I can make my life a lot easier if I just stop expecting it to be easier. Then there might be room for it to get easier. Acceptance of what is can be the first step to change. And acceptance is the only step to peace.

9/13/06 Wednesday I keep going and going, and I don't get to this wonderful Blog, and I think it's good for me to take this time for myself. If you think it was about you, you were wrong. Actually you're right, but from here, you're wrong. Splitting hairs, but I want to take this time for me to see how my art is doing. 

    Spent yesterday and today in Frankfort, KY. Yesterday I was consulting for the Kentucky Arts Council Craft Marketing Program mentoring some newer artists who are getting into the field. that is the most rewarding thing for me to do, and I really look forward to doing a lot more of it. It's not the same as teaching because these people are getting out in the field and using their skills to achieve their success. It's not for a grade, and I guess that's what's different compared to teaching. Teaching is great, but students who are in school have not chosen a career, much less refine it, while they are in school. I can see myself in pure heaven if this was all I did all day. Well, maybe half the day and half making art. Life is beautiful.

    I got home and worked on some cups tonight, and then went to a dinner at the Wellness Community, a nice reunion type of evening. Terri and Allan came out to look at Dominique's art work that was shipped over from France, and it was nice to have them out. 

    After spending so much time in the studio the last week or so, two days away feels like a lot. I was so anxious to be back in there tonight, even if for just a few minutes. The clay certainly has an addictive quality for me. I am looking forward to getting back in there tomorrow. 

9/8/06 Friday Thanks for your comments on the poem below. If you haven't written yet,  I would love to hear from you. It was amazing how it just came out the other morning, just flowed out on paper, almost. Well, maybe it took a while to et it to flow, but it wasn't hard. One of those times when I got in the flow, in the "zone." 

    This week was very productive in the studio, and Linda and Rachel were instrumental in getting so much done this week, too. Now that I've spent most of the days in the studio making pots this week, I think I could get used to that. I really want to find someone to handle more of the business and administrative parts of this company. That would make it more fun. And fun is why I'm here!

    This week I made medium bowls, small bowls, miniature teapots, lots of mugs, even more candlesticks, plates, man in the moons, suns, platters, wine glasses, and then in the face line we produced bowls, mugs, hats, salt & pepper shakers, pitchers. 

    On Sunday I brought boxes to my studio that were shipped here from France. They included my work that I had exhibited in France, and the work of my friend Dominique for the exhibit here at the Krohn. Unfortunately, packing was not up to the treatment most shipping goes through, and all but three pieces were not intact. I have a couple pieces in that series here that are unfired, but I think I can get them finished for the opening on September 29, Friday, 3-5 pm. Come on out to the Krohn at Eden Park for this opening! I'd love to see you there. Really, I mean it, please come to this opening. It will also feature the Fountain in the Alpine Garden that I collaborated on. Photo to come. 

9/6/06 Thursday  

I hear a cricket in the morning fog

a coolness in the air that seems foreign to this time.

Or am I the one living in August sweat glands

unwilling as yet to don longer clothes

unwilling, or at least reluctant, to reverse the summertime shrinkage of fabric. 

I still have the window open at night.

I'm glad I was soaking in the July heat of the sun's zenith

eschewing A/C as much as I could stand,

sweat cleansing rivers

a micron layer of hot tub

broiling and rendering my tissue's chemical exhaust.

The cycle reverses, the weather changes, 

marking the march of time.

A different season (the same)

a different day (same)

a different year (same)

tattooed with time's markers, my life's differences

floodlighted by the sameness of time's clicks.

9/1/06 Friday It's Friday already! Did you know it was Friday? What happened? It couldn't be a week and a half since the last Blog entry, could it? Did some aliens abduct me for a week? Were that it so easy an explanation. Actually its just a lot of work, it seems. All but Sunday, except I did work a little on Sunday as well, just not in the studio.

    Tonight was an opening of an exhibit at the Nordheim Gallery at Holmes High School in Covington. My pottery and sculpture are in  wonderful showcases in the school, and the gallery director, Trisha Brundage will give the students some background on the work. I enjoyed the opening very much, and met some very interesting people with great perspectives and great ideas. I really enjoy when the universe drops a gem in my lap, and then I can actually recognize it as such.

    The idea that sparkled for me is to have a page where I will have one item per day for sale or bid, and when that day is done, the item will be removed, and a new one put up for the next day. Never the same item available two days in a row. I have a good digital camera now that I can take some good pictures of them with. If you feel like giving me feedback on this great idea, please email me at larry@watsonclay.com 

    Today was a pretty busy day. I worked on getting orders together after I tore down the "photography studio." The photography studio is the arrangement I have for taking all my pictures. It's an extremely ungainly looking setup, but you can't see that in the photos. Hopefully, you will see some new photos on the web site. I think I'll need to take some more, but I have all the time in the world for that. . . . 

    At 11:00, one of my mentees (an artisan I'm mentoring for the Kentucky Craft Marketing Program) arrived for an hour and a half session to help him with his work. I really enjoy this process, and the mentees seem to really get a lot out of it, as well. 

    After lunch, a professional from the Small Business Development Center at NKU came to my studio and gave me lots of great ideas and good feedback on my business plan  and marketing plan. He was very encouraging about the direction I've been on for the last couple years, and I hope to capitalize on some of his ideas and opportunities. So that was another hour and a half. The rest of the afternoon was spent packing some orders, including one that has to be in New Jersey by the 6th. I was able to bill a few, so that was very nice to get out and invoiced. Time to recover financially. 

    Last night I took off for the music Guild in Glendale, and had a good time music-making. I didn't feel very musical for most of the evening, my rhythm seemed off, and my harmonica playing wasn't always there. But there were a few songs that really clicked, like a magical thing, and those songs seemed to make it all worth while.

    I had mentioned to Ralph, our Tai Chi teacher, about the concept of the movements being a whole series of points, instead of the end points of the movement being the focus. I think of it as all the points in between, and that those are the real part of the practice of Tai Chi, and maybe even Yoga for me. And a new analogy came to mind: music. Because when we play music, we don't give a damn about the ends: the beginning and the end. We are only concerned with the points in between, and the points in between those points, and the half steps in between. This is where the real magic begins, and that's when we never want to stop. Maybe music can be our best teacher for living in the now. 

    Yesterday was busier than today, with several trips out of the studio. I delivered the fountain to the Krohn, and the other segments looked really good. This will be quite a display, and you are all invited to the opening September 16! It won't be open at all until then, so don't even bother. But put it on your calendar. Much of the France exchange exhibit will be up as well, so I'd love it if you came to see them and let me know what you think. 

    Then I delivered some work to Robin Wood Flowers, and she loved the new rose vases so much she ordered 30 more! That is fabulous. So who do I get to make them? Oh, yeah, that's right, I do. I'm sure I can fit that in. The afternoon I worked on some more photography, and had some paperwork to do. No clay got done yesterday. I was lamenting and commiserating tonight with another artist that most people have no idea how much artists have to work. A lot of perceptions of artists include sleeping until noon, no financial responsibility, spending lots of time in coffee houses discussing "ideas" and art. Wouldn't that be the life? Actually, it wouldn't be the life for me. In all this madness, I am repeatedly reminded that I am receiving the success that I wished for, I am getting my heart's desire. Now I can change that picture and see me getting it without so much stress. Ah, but the tension is what keeps us moving, making new work, going new places with our work. 

    Wednesday I unloaded the kiln, and it was a fair firing. The greens turned out fabulous, but the kiln did not fire as hot as I thought it had, so the ambers did not flux out. I will refire those in the next load, which I may fire next week if I have enough work to fire. But maybe I'll wait until I get another load thrown and ready, and I can fire while that load dries. That could be dangerous, with the next fair coming up at the first of October, and the French artist I am hosting arriving on the 28th. That's pushing it. We'll see. 

    The firing on Monday took almost 15 hours. I guess I need to baby it a little less. Sometimes I let it stall because I am to conservative. I can learn. Saturday was spent glazing and loading the kiln, mostly, though I did get some throwing done. The Friday a week ago, we had a potluck reunion of the American artists in the France exchange, and got to take about the exchange at the end of the month. Thursday I got those emails out about the empty bowls. If you did not get one, click on http://clayalliance.org/ scroll down the left column and click on "Empty Bowls" for a really fun event. 

8/21/06 Monday So much going on! So much to keep up with, I'm a bit overwhelmed. The fountain is due next week, I'm trying to help organize the France exchange studio visits, hosting one of the French artists in September, taking care of my Mom's cat, taking care of some farm animals for a week, set up an exhibit next week, start on some of the orders I got in New York, plus some more that were waiting for me when I got back, make more molds for the orders, work on the publicity for the Guild show in October, prepare a whole new booth for the Hyde Park Art Show, update my web site, find a new apprentice, make new work for the Krohn exhibit at the end of September, and that isn't even touching my to-do list. 

    I got the kiln loaded with the fountain and one of my oversized teapots, jardienes, plates, ikebana, pitchers, teapots, mini teapots, mini pitchers, hummingbird feeders, wine glasses, mugs, vases, and I ran out of room for the rest. I'll fire the bisque tomorrow, and hopefully the glaze on Monday. Then I can start the whole cycle all over again. time to make up my production list from the orders. 

New York City, New York International Gift Fair

8-18-06

I joyfully slept in this morning, getting my 8 hours of sleep for once this week. Breakfast was the usual great buffet at the Leo House. I came to find out that a priest founded the Leo house as starting point for immigrants, a safe haven for their first days in the New World. It was built in the mid 19th century, at a time when the phrase "just got off the boat" was coined. So many of those emigrating from persecution and hardship were defrauded upon landing at the shores of Manhattan by predators who appeared to be so kind at first. They were defrauded of their life savings, their possessions, and their dignity.

On to the subway to get to my little cruise around the harbor, including the grand lady of the French, the Statue of Liberty. Rather fitting that it was a gift of the French, since it was with their financial help that America achieved its independence. It was a moment that I wished I had brought my camera.

Amazing how much history of New York I learned this week, especially the last two days. The first guide (a plus-sized transvestite) on the uptown bus was extremely informative, and s/he loved to sprinkle his/her commentary with political questions, though no actual answers. But s/he knew so much about the buildings and the people of New York, I was mesmerized. That was the best way to see it, I believe, though the downtown loop did not seem nearly as interesting. Perhaps that was due to the mis-employed lady who wasn't all that interested in talking. Perhaps she was talked out for the day. And the second fellow on the uptown tour (from the Metropolitan Museum back to Times Square) was a fountain of opinions and facts on all the things that were wrong in New York, especially when it came to financial inequities.

  As the boat docked after the harbor cruise, I did not resist the urge to climb aboard the USS Intrepid, An aircraft carrier commissioned in 1943 that served in the Korean and Vietnam wars along with World War II. Three football fields long, it is only half the size of current carriers. I felt ambivalent about the idea of immersing myself in the mechanics of the war machine, yet my childhood fascination with the biggest and mightiest machines of speed and power were at my fingertips. I have been so fascinated at the amount of power and flying ability bundled under a thin sheathing of aluminum in the shape of a flying burrito with wings.

8-17-06

Standing at the top of the Empire State Building, I was trying to decide if it was vertigo, or was the building actually swaying in the wind. I was pretty sure it was the latter.

     After jumping ship, or more accurately, the tour bus, at the world Trade Center Ground Zero, I walked around the empty chasm left at the foundation of the new center to be built. A carcass of a stairwell is the remnant of the towers and the lives annihilated with misdirected planes and misdirected minds.  Many have told me of feeling the energy of those who passed as well as the relatives who came to visit. Maybe I was too brain weary, too road worn, to have any sensitivity to that tonight. Or maybe it will be a delayed reaction. Too driven to worry about it.

   I was grateful for the online ticket for the Empire State Building, bypassing all the lines for the security check and the ticket lines. No idea how much time it saved me (and where was I going?) but I got to the top in time to see the twilight when the red setting sun in the west cast a glow on the buildings that were beginning to glow inside as well. I remained at the edge of the observation deck, looking down at the streets as the taillights took over the color palette. We were looking out at a sea of lights, reminding me of the night photo of the earth, realizing the energy being generated and consumed on this island of 1.6 million people. 

   Back at ground level, I wander the streets, taking the subway in laziness from 34th to 23rd, and a simple mile, if that. But I'm still tired, even with a nice panini sandwich and banana. I wandered around looking for a bar, but I didn't have the nerve to go into the upper crust cellar bar, nor the rough edged Trailer Park Bar, populated by more of the tattooed and cussing folks (most of the cussing was from the women) outside getting a cigarette. I resorted to having a pint purchased at the corner store in my room.

  In sudden moments of consciousness, I am struck by the novelty that I am actually wandering around New York, walking the streets, riding the rails, strolling through Central Park and Times Square. Here I am, and I am actually loving it. But I have discovered something about my traveling.

    I realize from the contrast of these city experiences, that my pursuit and coveting of experiencing the cultures of other cities, I am so much more aware of the affinity I have for nature, and the fact is that I want to travel to experience nature, not civilization. My intentions are changing, and I will be setting my sites on a different experience, such as the dessert, the Sierras, Olympic Park.

Standing at Ground Zero, looking at the 17 acre hole that had been completely cleared of rubble, save that concrete stairwell, I noticed a covered walkway that meandered from one side of the hole to the other, staying close to the side after entering at the middle. As I watched, a toy sized train came into that track, slowly, silently, rolling its way in a serpentine detour of the straight line it used to take when there was a World Trade Center to run through.  I stared at the subway until the last car disappeared back into the ground.

8-15-06

The fair started out at the opening bell with a very good museum sale, and capped off at the end with a sale to Craft Co. #6. Not only did she order, but she placed an order for the newest line of amber glaze! That is wonderful affirmation of my skill and the ability to see how it connects with current trends. Sometimes I feel like the trends are following me.

   Jeanne came by at the end of the show, and we had a marvelous Indian dinner at one third of the cost of the previous nights' dinners. It was great to be down on the lower east side, to watch the basketball league there on Fourth Street on a very famous court that is actually smaller than regulation. This court is know as the premier of the city for some of the hottest talent, and we were watching them. On the other side of the chain link fence were open handball courts, with some high intensity and skill demonstrated. It was fascinating to see a coed match being played, with most shots being taken by the women.

  Jeanne talked about the way the city has been cleaned up in almost every corner. Hardly any homeless people around, everyone feeling safe just about anywhere in the city, even the subways feel subdued. Just now, I'm thinking it has the quiet noise level of France, where people don't yell any more. None of the yelling from here to there like in the old movies and TV shows.

8-13-06

Sunday was a good day at the Fair. I got several orders totaling $2400, so I was on a good pace. Breakfast was not served at the Leo house, but the Chelsea Cafe on the corer was a qualified second. I don't know when I've had as much protein and starch in one week, except maybe in June in Europe. I can tell my body is rebelling; I have urges for vegetarian meals. Not hard to do, just a matter of not resorting to protein to stave off hunger.

   After the show, three of us, Jennifer, Jamie, and I, went to the Bodies exhibit at the South Street Seaport. The cab got us all disoriented right away by going west to get to the east side of town. We got there, just a bit confused. I kept telling myself to trust these cab drivers, they know what they are doing.

   The Bodies exhibit was good, but not all that revealing to me. I've studied a bit of anatomy vis a vis my cat scan. But I was totally obsessed with seeing this representation of the actual organs that were shoved a side by that autonomous tumor, that grapefruit sized goiter of the guts. It felt like such vindication to see how the tumor had no room to go and pushed the hell out of the heart and esophagus and the lung till the heart didn't want to work and filled the lungs with water, till the lung collapsed from the pressure and the water, till the head was unable to think from closing off the vein returning the blood from the head. It left me with a big question mark about my health history, and my emotional connection to it.

  A short walk from the museum, hell, right next door, we sat down for pizza, which turned out to be one hell of a good Hawaiian pizza. Through the entire exhibit I felt that I could fall asleep on my feet, but after that dinner, and some wonderful conversation, I was wired and unable to sleep.  After staying awake until after one am, I woke at 5:30, and started another day. Fortunately, I've taken the time for a nap in the afternoon sitting in a chair every day.

8-10-06

    I have arrived at the edge of the earth. Civilization runs right up to the edge, without panic or concern, without trepidation or hesitancy. The street grids and subdivisions evenly space themselves as consistently as the rest of the known world, right up to the abyss, belying the emptiness that abuts terra firma.'

    I know it is the edge, because the sky melds into it, with no distinguishable horizon, no sense of depth. The same blue that indicates the beginning of the endless universe begins right there at the shore.

    What if I couldn’t apply empirical logic to this tableau, this optical illusion of emptiness at the edge of my seemingly solid world? What if the pilot had not come on the intercom telling us we were looking at Lake Erie? This disorienting view, an almost vertigo sense of reality/ non-reality,

    Reprising the incapacity of the first Indians to be visited (such an innocuous word for an invading occupational party) by Columbus who were unable to see the ships because they had not experienced any thing even remotely like it. Looking down on the terrain from this jet, the lakes and rivers also look like seams through the earth into the outer space beneath, and even the shadows of the clouds begin to take on the same blankness, perhaps the clouds are worm hole lenses. After reading about super string theory, such transient solidity seems more possible, not nearly so incredible. An exercise in the imagination, and in a trust in this parallel reality. That's what we live in, maybe, is a parallel reality that obfuscates all the other possibilities.

    Looking down on the landscape, on the tracks of civilization like the tracks of snails on a dry sidewalk, it leaves a record of society's priorities. In one rural area, several car racetracks telegraph the recreational activities of a large number of people. Swimming pools are another tracer of leisurely time and desire.

   Perhaps as telling a file tab on society is the conversation of the young girl in the next row discussing her favorite car that she will get next; a 745i. BMW of course. 

  SUBWAY: The subway in New York, the first one I descended into, had an eerie effect on me. Standing in the glaring fluorescent light on the south bound, or downtown, side of the station, there are four sets of tracks in the tunnel, with regular upright support girders between each set. On the other side of this dark Metropolis dungeon is the uptown station, again in glaring lights. The uptown station has a Chinese musician playing an ancient box "fiddle" instrument consisting of two strings and unclear rhythm lines and dissonant notes. This surrealistic music is the perfect auditory backdrop for the chasm effect of these two unbridgeable groups of people. A distance of feet seems like the distance of the radio waves traveling to show us a TV sitcom studio set, or the film of the Alaska outback. That’s it, like a disjointed voyeuristic experience, because there is no way the two sides can communicate.

  And then, in the distance, the cacophony of the next train builds up in the tunnel, the ground vibrating with the bass tone, vibrating the upright girders like a piano strung with the same note on every key. The screeching brakes join in with the pennywhistle tones, harmonically off key, and the descending staccato of the wheels hitting the track. And the entire symphony grounds to a halt, holding the pause with an electric hum and the visual presence of stainless steel stretching down the track to  the ends of the station.

Wednesday 9-08-2006 I think I'm ready for New York! I leave tomorrow, and I am getting pretty jazzed about it, seeing all the info on all the great sights to see. I have these great ambitions to see the city even on the evenings that I work, but I'll have to see how I feel each night. I've already bought my ticket for the Empire State Building, along with my tour tickets. Conducting business at a fair is an exhausting affair, for those of you who have never tried it. A friend of mine who is 2 years younger says it takes him one or two days of doing absolutely nothing to recover from a fair. It's true no matter what age you are. I'll be counting on adrenalin carrying me thought the week, just like in Europe. Hopefully this trip won't be as exhausting, being only a week. But combining it with work will certainly require some sensible pacing and lots of naps! I hope my colleagues are comfortable with my napping, because it will be the only way I'll keep my sanity and coherence. In Europe, I usually took my naps in the parks. Just find a nice expanse of green and lie down with my pack under my head. Sweet. 

Saturday 5-08-2006  I'm getting pretty excited, and a little less spazzed about my trip to New York City! I got some really good advice from my sister to take one of the bus tours. I found a really good package for $50 that will give me three bus tours; Midtown and south, Harlem and the museums, and a night tour. It will also give me a boat tour of the harbor. This will take much of my time, and so I am feeling like I can take in some other museums and sights at other times. I hope I can get around in the evening when the workday ends at 6. I know I'll be tired, but if I put my mind into neutral, my judgment mode on hold, and just be with it, I think I can do some stuff. 

    Plenty of museums to see, and the Empire State building. Or maybe the World Trade Center site. So little time, so much fun. 

    I'm feeling better because I have a grasp of the subway and bus system, the city layout of streets, and where some of the sights are. This tour idea will allow me to relax so I don't have to find everything. The tour bus allows us to hop off at certain sights and get back on when we're done. I like that feature. 

    You probably don't know what a big deal this is. NY has always intimidated me in the past, but after traveling around Europe the way I did, I figure it's not much more than that. Just taller. 

Later: Finally, another fire in the fire pit. It doesn't take much time, but time slows down to a crawl. The embers and rising fire roast my shins. Eventually I notice the shadows and glow of the ovoid 3/4 moon hanging low in the southern night sky. Stars line up around the black fields of the galaxy's bottomlands, in the order of the universe - none.

    My mind wanders to the Louvre in Paris. (You want logic, look to an engineer's Blog) Walking up to the courtyard in the late evening after a visit to the Orangerie's Monet exhibit, the glass pyramid lays low in an expanse framed by historic architecture that stretches for hundreds of feet. The horizontal and vertical lines of the original buildings become so obvious with the pyramid's low angles. 

    Many have objected to the contemporary nature of the pyramid as almost sacrilegious to the history of the Louvre, but I found it to actually enhance the old buildings with its visual reference to even earlier roots that go back to the origins of known history. The Egyptian pyramids hold the awe of everyone at the ability to design and create such architecture and artistry buried with the kings of successful orderly societies. IN one way, the glass pyramid is a juxtaposition in the courtyard of the ancient Louvre, but that contrast in materials merely draws the entire tableau into the 21st century, while the form adds historical reference and a dissonant note to create architectural harmony.

    An additional dimension, completely subliminal, is the implied volume of the passages and rooms that the pyramid hints at. Knowing that there are many rooms and halls under and reaching out from the pyramid, it can provide associations of such hidden treasures. It is the tip of the iceberg. The aforementioned association is precious, and leads to the association of the invisible nature of art, the part that is left to the spectator's imagination. For centuries, the artist has always hidden his true message under the obvious, almost in a DaVinci Code allegory of hints and clues as to the artist's real intentions. Follow the clues, but remember that there are no lives at stake, no right answers; there is only the delight of conscious explorations of the unconscious.

Wednesday 2-08-2006  Today was another split personality day. Had a great start to the day with some yoga, ran to Staples to pick up price lists, to Home Depot for some fuses, and got working in the studio. Then splitting personalities: to being a certified mentor with the Kentucky Arts Council for a conference call, then to marketing, and -my exercise in futility-  reading through the to-do list that is surely a fantasy novel by now. Back to the studio, to make some plates and pitchers. Linda got a lot of work done for me, so that was a help.

Yesterday the air conditioner blew all the fuses I had, so I went to Home Depot for the materials for putting in a dedicated 20 amp line for it, along with some fuses that turned out to be the wrong type. Worked in the dark with a headlamp putting the new line and plug in and hooked it up to the fuse box the proper way. That felt good to get done and done right.

New York is one week away, and I got my buddy pass cleared away with Cassie, a very generous art supporter who likes my work, too. In other words, and art fan with good taste. So the prep for New York is actually coming along, but I'm spazzing a bit over it with the things that I need to finish. Actually, that's a good thing, because it keeps me motivated! Fear is a good motivator. I would like to have an additional photo sheet with every item on it, but I have a feeling that would take too much time. I also want to have an entire kiln load finished before I leave so that it dries while I am gone and I can fire them up when I get back, ready to ship out some orders. 

Do you like to watch the lightening? I was driving to Tai Chi and was wondering where I could go and park to watch the lightening raining down on the city and countryside. What a beautiful light show. Then when I came back in from the studio after working on some pitcher lips at 9:30, the half moon was peeking out from some dark clouds. Being out here in the country is such a blessing. 

The artists that I stayed with in France will be coming here in the fall, and I have a habit of looking at my world from a foreigner's view. Last year, Vladimir, one ceramic artist I met and spent the day with in Ukraine back in 1992, was here in town for a month long project. I got to bring him to my studio, and I realized what it feels like on the other end of the visit. Being the host made me feel somewhat like being under a microscope. In addition, it's hard to tell what is interesting to the other person! I could babble on ad infinitum about something they couldn't care less about, and I wouldn't even know it. 

But this time I am looking at a lot of the things I do and what I make and where I live, and, seeing it from an outsider's perspective, from way outside, I can see how lucky I am. This is such a fabulous job, and I have a hard time imagining anything else. But things always change, so no telling what can happen in the future. 

The new Blog program on the other button seems to have too many problems. I'll have to find a new program. 

Sunday 30 07-2006 At the Cincinnati Blues Festival in Cincinnati last night, I was standing in awe, my jaw on the ground, witnessing a display of guitar virtuosity that would put many of the greats to the pale. As a 19 year old, Ryan Hickey was merely a side show for the Festival, a small booth, called Under 21 Jam, on the side that played while the main stage set up the next act. No lights, one microphone, accompanied by a drummer and bass, he attracted a crowd like moths to a flame, and held them (and me) spellbound for 15 minutes. His specialty was Jimmy Hendrix, but Jimmy never sounded so good, it seems. I had only one beer of auditory enhancement, so the alcohol factor was not sufficient to provide the almost transcendent quality of this performance. The crowd was totally sucked in during his runs, taking a breath to yell and scream their appreciation at the conclusion of each one. 

    I had promised myself every year, I am going to go down to the Blues Festival and see these acts live. The sponsoring station broadcast them every year, but they could only broadcast the main stage, and most of the real blues, the gritty and passionate blues, was on the other three stages spread out around Sawyer Point. On Friday, Catfish Keith played. Rather, he slid, ripped, and extracted a southern blues from his steel guitar that was unequivocally his own. The crowd brought him back for three encores. I felt like I had discovered a new precious stone in a field of diamonds.

    ON Saturday, the most authentic blues of the show that I heard was the All Star Blues Jam at the Local Stage. Tucked away under trees and between the other stages, set against the backdrop of the river less than 20 paces behind the stage with barges making their steady way up the river, cigarette boats skipping the waves, the continuous mix of musicians provided enough licks and runs to fill a box set. These people were having a lot of fun, playing with the best, drawing the most from their instruments for a happy crowd. A fellow patron asked me what the band's name was, and after explaining the nature of the jam session, she said this was the "real" blues, this was the best stage at the Festival. I couldn't have agreed more. I stayed until the last note echoed out over the water and under the bridges, echoing through my thoughts into this morning. 

    So is this just a recount of a pleasant night? Hardly. For artists, and for you, all that we see and hear and touch and feel becomes a part of our art. During these fabulous displays of talent and skill, the passion and synergy of the artists was my indelible impression to take to my work. Even listening to some of these musicians made me realize that I may have been holding back a bit, that I have more to put into my pottery and my art. I have more designs and ideas and compositions and arpeggios and airs to express. 

"Old musicians don't stop playing, they just drop."

Buddy Guy

Tuesday 25-07-2006 I've been trying to get another Blog system working, but just when I thought I had it set up, I can't get it to take my password. I look forward to the new system because you will have the opportunity to make comments and further discussion by clicking on a button. That will be fun to turn this into a dialogue. I would really enjoy that.

    I was listening to a radio program today that brought up the conundrum that technology actually reduces the humanity in our lives. We have machines talking to machines. That's what I'm doing right now, isn't it? But the written word has been a part of our personal communication for some time, so I guess a different form of that isn't bad. You still have to read it, don't you? It's just not on a piece of paper. Yet. 

    But I began thinking about the position of the arts in a technological world. As the technology reduces the humanity in our lives, we have the opportunity to increase the humanity in our lives with the acquisition and enjoyment of art in our homes and places of work. All the plastic that you see around you right at this moment, could be softened with a bunch of hand made art work that can do the job or enhance some of the products sitting around you. 

    For example, I have this beautiful glass pitcher on my TV, orange with a bright green Tim Burton handle. And next to that is a fabulous ceramic hand built vase, about 5 or 6 inches tall, with a definite attitude. It sure softens that TV, even making the TV less significant, which is good for me to think of it as less important than a lot of things. On top of my stereo is a raku tea bowl that I made when I was a student at NKU, and next to that is a awesome green covered jar that I purchased from Ray Bridewell at his senior show. Sitting on my computer monitor is a hand carved "fish" letter opener that I got at the St. James Festival in Louisville. These things add so much humanity to my daily life, along with all the hand made dishes that I have purchased over the years. My cupboard practically is bursting with cups, mugs, and bowls from artisans I've enjoyed. 

    This is an opportunity to look around you and see what you have acquired and what it adds to your life. Have you regretted any purchase? I didn't think so. This is how we maintain humanity, with the human hand. And why not pile artwork on the TV? It could actually find it's highest use that way!

Monday 24-07-2006 Today was such a beautiful day, in the conventional way of thinking. Temperatures in the 89s, blue skies with harmless and puffy little clouds passing over. The smells of the green all around me was noticeable in the house with the windows open. The smell surprised me, that I would notice=e it and take such joy in an ambiguous smell. What is the smell of summer? I'm sure it is a combination of living and dying vegetation, the soil drying out, trees growing and dead trees rotting. All the life and death combines for a simple symphony of olfactory delights. But who says it is delightful? Probably not many/ I beg your indulgence in my humble opinion.
    I started on remaking the fountain today, and it is amazing how things get easier with each attempt. That's why the high cost of custom work. so many times the work has to be made over after the first attempt. As talented as we artists are, we do have to develop our skills. That's why I say that, when asked how long it took to make that teapot, I say it took26 years. Every bit of that experience is in each pot. And then I learn some more. 
    The kiln we unloaded today was very good. I realized how much I pay attention to what I want to happen. The urgency of orders or a show can leave me anxious under the pressure, and uncertain of my abilities. When I relax and focus on the success I want, I can focus on all the things that go into that success. But sometimes we, I , end up sabotaging our success. I realize how much I am in control over what happens. Not a victim.

Tuesday 18-07-2006 I have had this idea of expanding my mentoring role at a craft business incubator. So I started floating the idea around to some people I know in high places, and I found out that it's already being done! I'm hoping I can get involved in the process and in the mentoring role in the incubator. That would be so great, like a dream come true. But isn't that what they are supposed to do? The universe is here to make me happy, I know. 

    The firing yesterday didn't go too well, I think the fountain blew on one side. The pilots that I lit Sunday night went out, and so it was still wet, I guess. I couldn't see it, but I thought I saw pieces that had blown off of the side facing the burners. I'll unload tomorrow, maybe it was from something else. I can always make another one. 

    Orders are starting to come in for the fall, so I can imagine this fall could be extremely busy. I am tempted to add another art fair to my schedule, but if I do and the orders are coming in from New York, I would regret it. But if I don't get enough orders, I'll wish I had applied to the show. I think I'll count on the orders. 

    I spent most of the day at the computer today, ready to glaze my tail off tomorrow. Along with Joyce and Linda.

Monday 17-07-2006  I went camping this past weekend at Cowan Lake, in the heat (loved it) and the lake. The weather was quite nice, to me. I enjoyed having all the kids all around, playing and screaming. I got used to people being all around, and eventually not being self conscious. There are some beautiful trails to hike up there, and an observation deck to watch the birds from. Kayaking at sunset was like floating on a watercolor painting. Watching the lake was a lesson in stillness, realizing how much we are in action. Seeing the lake so still in the backwaters, and thinking about how little action there is in nature. Yet it all gets done. The kayak presents so many different viewpoints. So it occurred to me that it is a contrast to my daily life of constantly doing, and how DaVinci knew that genius often comes in the not-doing. So in nature, there is so much stillness with moments of action, of doing. I want more of that stillness.

Wednesday 12-07-2006 this wet weather has really slowed things down in the studio. I have left things out uncovered for two days, and they were still too wet to work on today. That is very unusual. I would like to load the kiln tomorrow and fire on Friday, but I don't think it will all be dry enough to load. That's alright, I know I've made more than I can fit in the kiln, with the large fountain. I want to fire that now incase it doesn't turn out, and then I'll have time to make another one before September. 

  Yesterday Chris called and is coming out for some shopping here at the studio.   Made some soup tureens today, finished hummingbird feeders, vases, jardienes. The jardienes are a wonderful bulbous shape, thanks to the new heat gun. Things are very consistent with the help of that little tool. 

    Packed an order for a new gallery in Atlanta called Bumblebees. Had a good day with my apprentices, got a lot done. Still dreaming about my idea for a business incubator for artisans. I love that idea. I love the idea of just letting it happen. That's the way it works, hold the dream and see all the pieces come to me. This idea really sings for me. 

    Still thinking about the trip to Europe. Wish I had more time to write about it. Of course there's time. . . 

Monday 10-07-2006 I spent almost the whole day in the studio, ignoring the palm pilot almost entirely. I read today that emails are not really efficient when it comes to office communication. That's interesting. But I found that I had become somewhat addicted to email as a social structure in my life, and as a way to feel significant. Awareness is a double edged sword, it seems.

    I threw an awful lot of stuff today, and it will take me through Wednesday to finish it. I checked the gas tank, and it looks like I might not have enough gas to fire the bisque on Friday, as I had planned. It costs $85 for a special delivery, so I will have to rethink this a bit. I felt pretty strong and constructive today, I think I may be recovering from the European Odyssey. I am going camping this weekend, and I am looking forward to it. Not really sure if I'll take the sailboat with me, I may want to sit around a lot more than that. Just go with a book or two, a swim suit, and some hiking shoes. And a very comfortable chair. Aaaahhh.

    Last night, Rhonda had the gang from France over to her house to look at pictures and a wonderful potluck, and some good conversation. We also worked on some plans for the exchange in September with the French artists and a possible studio tour while their here. 

    Looking back at Paris, it seems like such a long time ago. The following is an entry in my journal:

"Saint Chappell
The windows are an unbelievable montage of images. and each transom is a different design. As I started to look at the designs, I began to see a series of violent panels, A man holding up a bloody head, and the panels around it showed the events leading up to the beheading, and the head on a pike. So I seemed to make the conclusion that the entire series in the entire church was about violence. It occurred to me that I was looking for violence, and there could me so much more in the way of compassion and love expressed in these panels. We see what we are looking for. 

    The light from this glass is so subtle, and full. Looking at people's faces I can see full color, and the differences in complexions is highlighted. It is not bright in here, but very subdued. Two very small alcoves to each side, the walls are covered with gold paint on all the pillars and raised piping. Complex patterns for medieval times, Saints on the pillars with little houses above their heads. 
    I noticed that I started to develop some confidence on the metro, not just because of the fact that I was able to get around on it, but that I saw men and women with confidence strutting and going about their business. It didn't seem like anyone was afraid of anything on the metro, though they may have been a little wary. I felt rather safe. The movie with the bus and the derelicts had me worried, I guess. That was right here in cite, so I couldn't tell if it was fictional. Maybe things really change that much at night. I can see that I am not getting a picture of Paris people in these sites, but of the tourist picture. Sometimes I wonder if I am staring too much.
This light is very mesmerizing, I really find I don't want to go anywhere. 
Amazing how the church makes one look up. Is that something that stops happening at some point, jaded? The stars at the apex of the roof are like magnets, it seems."

Thursday 6-07-2006  I worked on the fountain quite a bit today, finishing the pitchers as well. New designs, and new handles. So much work to finish. I would love to fire the bisque next Thursday, so that I could go camping next week. It would feel a lot better if I could get that done. So much paper work to do as well. When I can stop all the paper work, I can get all the pottery done. How do I do that? IT takes intention first. What is my intention?

    What a fabulous evening of music making with the music Guild of Glendale! I had so much fun playing music with that bunch of guys, it was really a treat. I kept saying to myself as I was getting ready that I should spend the evening working and maybe doing some yard work, but I felt compelled to get to the Guild and play, even if I wasn't feeling like a maestro. They even complimented me a couple time, but sometimes I think they're a bit generous. Paul, being an academic and a teacher, with a very discerning ear, has even offered me solos. That's a surprise. I don't know what they hear, but I hear a lot of mistakes. Maybe that's a good sign, that I can tell good playing when I make it, and bad when I do. 

    It was a great ending to a day, I just felt on top of the world all the way home, and especially while I was there. Sometimes the songs will start out really rough, and at some point they can just click into place, and all this energy is generated in a sympathetic way, a symbiotic way, simpatico. It's even more obvious when the harmony is lost, and the contrast makes those moments of resonance so much more precious. Precious. 

Wednesday 5-07-2006 Today was spent largely on the fountain again. Lots of experimentation with the fountain head, drilling the holes for the cross spouts, designing the pedestal. Also through some pitchers that I will add the handles to tomorrow. I played around with the spouts and added a twist to the lip that turned the view from above into a happy face. Cool. I love it. 
Yesterday I finished the mini teapots. Got some new designs, and I think they will be really good for the green and orange color scheme. I am getting a new orange glaze from a glaze guru, I am tired of looking and piddling about. I want patience, and I want it now!

Monday 3-07-2006 PM It was good to get back in the studio today. The morning wasn't very productive, I think the jet lag had a bear hug on my ambition, but after lunch (at the Mexican restaurant) I felt fabulous. I made the basic form for the Krohn fountain, and it was really rather easy, especially with Joyce's help with the heat gun. It went very smoothly. 

    The amazing thing about today is that it is one of those hot & humid summer days, the kind of day that I usually reach for the a/c control at the first hint of sweat. I actually enjoyed the heat. I didn't turn on the a/c in the studio or the house, I had sweat running down my face and my arm, helping with the throwing lubrication, and I wanted more! What is this?! I have no idea, but maybe it's the detoxifying effect of sweat, or maybe I've been abducted by aliens recently. Whatever it is, I am grateful that I am actually enjoying the heat of summer. This is a real treat. I've talked to people who said they loved it hot, but I didn't believe them, or thought they were just delusional. Now I know. It's possible. 

    Yeah, that's why you pulled up my Blog today, so you could hear about my sweat, my joyful sweat. 

    Film at 11:00.

AM I have returned from Europe, and I am beginning to recover from the exhaustion. The last three days I have spent a lot of time resting, it seems. I got back Thursday night on a miraculous opening for a flight after three days on standby at the Frankfurt airport. That's a long story in itself. You can find out more if you would like to get a copy of my travelogue, which I'll be working on in the next few weeks. Those who supported my trip will receive a complimentary copy.

    I am ready to get back to work, but I would love to spend all my time on the many ideas that I received while I was in France. Most of the ideas had nothing to do with what was going on around me, just like with workshops, but they had everything to do with what is going on in my head. Ideas build on themselves, sort of like buildings, only this is much more organic and unpredictable. 

    I have so much work to do to get ready for New York in August (The International New York Gift Fair) and to get the fountain ready for the Krohn. And I also want to get started on the ideas for new work that I got when I was in France and Paris and Lucerne and Frankfurt. It reminds me of Monet's heroic sized paintings at the Orangerie in Paris (six feet high, and 300 feet long when laid end to end), and he said he felt so driven to paint them. He was still working on them when he died, and had admitted that they were of such ambition that would be more appropriate for a younger man. 

    Off to work!

Monday 12-06-2006 I met for the final design session with the Cincinnati Parks for the fountain installation collaboration for the "Alpines" show at the Krohn main exhibit area. 

This is the maquette for the fountain upper section, and Suzanne Fischer is producing the fountain base with tile mosaics. After seeing the components near each other, We were getting excited about the potential and the great centerpiece that it is going to be. It's wonderful how accidents are the best teachers: the weep wholes I put near the top spouted instead of wept, and created a cross stream to the flutes coming off the top. Gerald thought that was the best effect! A couple of extra pieces have been added to the design, but I guess I've bought into it so much that I am willing to do it. Gerald says that the problem is that someone will want to buy this thing. The rest of us thought that would be great! Maybe this is a new niche market for me. I can get the water garden shops to have a video of this thing in their shops.  Too many ideas. 

    I went to the Carnegie opening last Friday, and a great idea for an exhibit about my France experience came to me while looking at the print show, so I have some options there for the return. I will start on finding an exhibit space when I get back. I've got 6 patron pieces to make for it.

    I leave for France tomorrow!!!!! No, I'm not packed yet. If I had a chance I would update this Blog if I thought someone had my web publisher.. Maybe I can figure it out tomorrow. 

Sunday, 4-06-2006 Returned home from SummerFair, the exhaustion sets in, and all great plans to make use of the evening dissipate with my energy. After a short rest with my mind in neutral in front of the television, I took Rudy for a short walk, falling into a mesmerizing rhythm, step after step. Soaking in the lush green, so close to the green of my pottery, I watch the glitter of the suns last rays through the trees, each star of glowing light softening through the tired lenses of my weary eyes. 

    This is the contented exhaustion of good hard work, an event completed, a major task accomplished. I have plenty of second guesses, even regrets, for decisions and approaches taken, but having seen the turnaround from dismal on Friday and Saturday, to my best Sunday ever, I am pleased with my ability to adjust. I enjoy talking to all the people who come into my booth so much more when I realize I am talking to individual souls, when I see the diversity of each person as part of the tapestry of humanity, I can accept and relate to each one as their own perfection. At that point, the sale becomes a bonus, not a goal. And so much more connection is found for each of us. 

    Tuesday I decided to make a call to SummerFair to see about my status, having been waitlisted back in March. I was pretty sure that there were usually some artists who were unable to make it at the last minute because of family or other emergencies, and I was counting on being called for such a situation. They informed me that someone would call me if needed, but they asked that I not show up at the gate to wait for a space. Well, in all probability, I would have made my unannounced arrival on Thursday, but they called me a couple hours later with an invitation! That was a nice gift. 

    The show started out damp on Friday, but the rain stopped for the most part at the start of the show, on the dot! It was cool, but the real shoppers and collectors came out for the light crowds, and made for a good day of sales for me. Saturday was absolutely perfect, the crowds arrived in droves, but the sales for me were among my lowest for a Saturday. The amazing thing is that Sunday was busier than any I ever had, making up for the weekend. It turned into a good weekend for me, and I will take my $ale$ and pay some bills before I leave for France. 

    Thanks to all of you who took my art home with you! And thanks to all of you who came out to lust for my pottery, and make plans to get it next time. You all keep me working and excited about what I do. With your response to my teapots and pitchers, I believe that will be my new emphasis for future shows. The oversized teapot that I had made sold on Sunday for $400, which is great affirmation for the idea of special teapots. And the miniatures were selling more than the full sized ones! That was more affirmation. 

Wednesday 17-05-2006 Been a long time! Plenty of work to do, so by the time I sit down to this it would be late, and just wanting to veg for a while. Getting ready for the Guild show, going on TV this morning, getting ready to ship the France show, meeting tonight for details on the France trip, publicity to go out for the Studio Sale next Saturday, need to contact some people in France for when I get to Paris. That's a partial on my to-do list for today. I'll see if I can get back to you later.

Monday 8-05-2006 The Clay Alliance show on Saturday was absolutely beautiful! The weather couldn't have been more perfect, and the crowd was great. The sales were down again this year. So much for the news spin on the recovering economy. Maybe the FCC could look into that as an issue of truth in advertising. But that's OK, I know I am just wetting their appetite, and everyone will be eating up the new mini teapots next show! They are just too cool! These are from the last firing that I unloaded on Thursday. It was a great firing! Finally!

    Just as I get the firing right, my oxy-probe goes a little catty-whompus, so I need to talk to the tech guy about the issues it has with working flawlessly. I'm sure it's a minor matter that I can fix real soon. 

    Friday I was a presenter at an "Arts Day" at St Ursula Academy. I really enjoyed relating my art with the grade school children, from 2nd grade to 8th grade! One teacher told me that she had never seen her class so quiet and mesmerized! And that was the 8th graders! That felt good. I really try to pour myself out to them, to make it as interesting and comprehensive as possible. It's interesting how some of the classes get into it more than others, and I wonder what I am doing to make that happen. I'm a slow learner, but I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually.

    Today I went for a walk after lunch, and it's been a while since I did that. Thanks Joyce! The colors were so intense at that hour, with the sun overhead, and the perfect spring breeze, the red tail hawks circling. Rudy had a great time, and he took two swims! I wonder if I'll be able to keep him out of the creek once summer really hits its stride. It was a lovely distraction. As the Calvin & Hobbs cartoon in my studio says, "Whenever I have some serious thinking to do, I go for a walk in the woods - there's a million distractions out there."

    I was introduced to a new park yesterday at the Little Miami River along Kellogg avenue across from Four Seasons. It's a little walking trail along the river, and it is so serene, the water looks so green and rich when it reflects the trees on the other side, the graceful curve of the shoreline. I plan on going back there a lot, as an alternative to California Nature Preserve. Thanks Jeanne!

    I didn't get a lot - actually none - clay work done today, though Joyce made some Mugs  and hats for me. I was still in show recovery mode, so I was piddling here and there, processing orders, catching up on email from the weekend. Sometimes the to-do list just gets a bit overwhelming. One thing, and one step, at a time. 

    I had a friend come out to the studio to buy some plates, and to see my studio. I really enjoy showing off my studio, but it doesn't seem that big a deal to me. So I don't know what to show people. The studio is really the process, there isn't anything to show them, I guess. But once they see this beautiful setting that I work in, they can understand the inspiration for my work. Thanks Lynda and Freddie!

    Time to get ready for the Kentucky Guild show in two weeks. I actually have left the van pretty much loaded for that show, and if I can plan it right, I would like to go to the Red River Gorge for a day before the fair. That sounds like a good way to get grounded before the fair, so that I am centered for the entertainment of my guests. That's what it's about, is entertainment, telling my story, relating my thinking and environment so that people can take the story with them. We're not selling stuff, we're selling the whole package. When you buy my work, you buy a piece of me. You wanna piece of me?! You got it!

Monday 1-05-2006  Another week and a half have passed me by, and each day I intend to get to this page and tell you what is going on! Not a dull moment. So I'll see if I can reconstruct it for you.

    Yesterday was the end of the Silent Auction at New Thought Unity, and I was very tickled to have had so many items bid on and purchased! It was a very successful event, and I sold nine pieces, including the large amber jar. It was so nice to be so supported by people who want to see me get to France! The good news is that I have to make some more work to replace it all for the art fairs and shows that coming up. I really look forward to working in the studio. 

    Today was glazing day, trying to get my last kiln load in before the Clay Alliance Fair on Saturday. It was also the glazing of the pieces that are going to France. That is such a challenge to glaze these one of a kind pieces, to sit down and focus on them for a while until the right color combinations come together. But I think I got it right. The glazes don't look anything like they will when they come out of the kiln, so it is all imagination. I actually seem to enjoy that part. 

    Saturday I worked in the studio glazing a little bit, after a morning at Ault Park. I went for World Tai Chi Day, which was a great way to start my birthday! Then Rudy and I walked in the woods for the rest of the morning, really enjoying the trees and wildflowers in their full spring glory. It all felt so good, so connected while I was there. 

    In the evening I went to a musical performance that included African beat music, rap, and a fusion band that was a rap-jazz band. The last group was out of this world, to me. I had such a good time, I didn't get home till after 2! I sure paid for it the next two days.

   Friday I unloaded the kiln and started glazing, and finished some wine glasses and two casseroles. I have a hard time focusing on time when I am working in the clay, and I am a hypocrite when I tell my apprentices to watch the time while they are working to see how efficient they are. But I don't see how I can go any faster than I do, I've been doing this for 26 years! It's really nice to get lost in the moment. 
    Reading about the French and their perception of time has helped to let my mind wonder to what is right in front of me! Instead of worrying about the future, or rehashing the past, my mind gets lost in the activity of the moment sometimes, and it is bliss!

    Thursday was more clay work, throwing the glasses, finishing up some other pieces. Thursday is already looking like ancient history. I have no idea what else I did. Linda helped me a lot on Thursday with a bunch of work in the studio. 

    That's about it for tonight. I worked till almost 10 tonight, and so I'm going to sign off for now!

Friday 21-04-2006 I started using this form of the date because it seemed easier. Duh. Europe has been using it for quite a long time. So much I am learning by going to France! I contacted a friend of a friend in Paris, I am hoping she can give me some guidance on my stay there. I started looking a maps of Paris, and my blood began to rise, I was getting excited at seeing names like Notre Dame, and then I saw the Rue de Klee, the street of Paul Klee, one of my favorite modern painters! Isn't that cool?! 

    I worked on some more mini teapots today, and threw some teacups. Fired the kiln again, with the work that we had reglazed. I think the firing went very well, and I think the work will all turn out beautiful! Yes. It was actually fun to be working on assembling those mini teapots at 8:30 at night. On a Friday. Wow. I'd say my priorities may have changed since I was in my 20's.

    I have listed the duplex and now I can sell it and be done with it!!! Yeah! 

    Set up the silent auction at Unity in the morning, went to the framers market on Court Street downtown Cincy, dropped off a busted window at the glass place, and, since it was on the next block, I had lunch at La Mexicano in Newport, one of my favorite places. Got back to the studio about 2:30. A good chunk of the day spent out and about, but I think I kept focused pretty well. Sometimes when I am out like that I am tempted to go shopping for things I "need". 

Here's a picture of the view from the duplex. It's hard to give that up. This is Cincinnati downtown at night.

Click on picture for larger image

Thursday 20-04-2006 I thought I'd show you some of my latest teapots that I am really happy with:

Click on the picture for a larger image.

The larger teapot is a normal sized functional one, and I assembled four of those today. Those hold about 3 or 4 cups, and the small ones hold less than half a cup. The handle is changing as I go, and that is the exciting part of this. I find myself stopping and staring at these pots because it's something new and more vibrant! I also started some extra large teapots, not exactly functional since they would hold about a gallon or so. I'll get you a picture of that as it progresses. I also threw some small teapots that hold about a cup, a "private" teapot, if you will. I just came in from the studio and it's almost 9pm. I realize how much under the gun I am with all these shows coming up, so I put in some extra time. 

    I'll be gone fro at least half the day tomorrow. I will be setting my work up at New Thought Unity Center for a silent auction with 3 other of the artists going on the France Art Exchange, and then meeting a real estate agent about selling the duplex. When I think about the duplex, I am grateful for all that it has provided me, but I feel almost guilty for selling it. Maybe not guilty, but insecure. I've seen that as my security blanket through all these years of art, and it's scary to walk away from it. I also wonder at whether I am walking away from learning opportunities in the people I attracted with the rental property. What I've come to conclude is that I am not ready for those lessons right now, and maybe the same lessons will come to me after I sell the property, but in a form in which I can learn more easily. 

    I have volunteered to arrange the TV publicity for the Clay Alliance Spring Fair that is coming up on May 6. I spent about 40 minutes today working on those phone calls to get the ball rolling. Now it's a constant game of telephone tag, finding out what the producers want and who can do it. The great thing is that I find myself on TV a lot more, and that gets people thinking I must be somebody important or really talented or smart. Ha ha! It just means that I took the time to call and was willing to go over and do it. It sure is nerve racking, I can tell you that. And I sure have found out about the egos of some of these TV news casters (not all). Hope none of them go so low as to read the Blog of one of their minions. Could be ugly.

    See you later! Thanks for visiting!

Tuesday 18-04-2006 Had a nice finish to the day doing some chanting/toning. Very relaxing, especially after the way I've been taking everything on in my head-shoulders-neck. 

    I was able to get  a little work done in the studio, but not much, it seemed. Just finished the jardienes I had started on Saturday. It took much more time than I had planned, but I had a blast making them! The new "twist" on my handles is really adding a lot to the work. Maybe I'll get you some pictures of those and my new mini-teapots that are just amazing. I was able to make the handles small and thin enough to make just the right scale and feel. It's interesting how working in a smaller scale has provided a different perspective on the way the different elements relate to each other. I feel it's akin to the way a photograph suddenly makes the relationship of the objects in the picture relevant to each other. Yet looking at the same e tableau in our surroundings, the same elements seem so disconnected and irrelevant. The miniature teapots take on a new composition and drama now, compared to the full size teapots. Now I am looking forward to doing the same thing with the mini pitchers. Then! I want to try going the other way with some way oversized teapots and pitchers. Push the limits!

    I'm glad I took the time to write to you, because it helps me get excited and revved up about what I am doing, instead of focusing on how I went and spent my afternoon at the duplex trying to get it fixed up for renting. I don't think I'm cut out for being a landlord. It's only taken me 24 years to figure that out. 

    Well, guess where the focus just went off to! Rein that big bad brain back in, and focus on the art! I also got some glazes mixed, some test glazes too, and Joyce made a good suggestion to try an old glaze that I had originally wanted to use with the green. The other orange glazes that I had gotten from ClayArt web site for testing did not turn out in the last firing, but I don't know if that was because of the over reduction in that last kiln load or not. So I want to re-test them, but I can't find the test batches! I put them somewhere that I wouldn't lose them, ya know. 

    Tomorrow I should be able to spend the day in the studio, except for the time doing paper work. But the paperwork is getting much easier since I have actually begun to break it up into components and not obsess over finishing one or moving onto more and more and more! It will eventually all get done, if I just eat the elephant. One bite at a time. 

    I just was looking at my picture above in the orange shirt, and I really think I am a goofy looking dude! Really! I look at myself and just see a cartoon! But I'm glad some people don't see me that way, and I've learned to accept that this self image is probably flawed, and that's OK. But, hey, it's like hearing your voice on a tape recorder, ya know?

    Thanks for being here! I here about some of you checking this occasionally, and it feels really good to know that someone is reading this! It keeps me inspired to keep writing, although the catharsis is reason enough. But if you would like to give me a shout out just send an email to larry@watsonclay.com and say hi!

Saturday 15-04-2006 The lightening was spreading across the sky like computer generated images of alien planets, or maybe Jupiter. The bolts spread into fingers that spanned across a third of the sky, sparking new forked trees of white light that spread all the way across the night sky from horizon to horizon. Sitting by a camp fire blazing away under this canopy of atmospheric electricity, we were in awe of the display. The thunder was more than 10 seconds in traveling to us, so we knew the lightening was just under the cloud ceiling of 2 miles or more. A few droplets of rain reached our skin, probably just a hint of the downpour that could have been evaporating in that 2 miles of air on its way to us. 

    It was amazing to hear so many people talking about the lightening today and describing their own experience of the continuous display. Eventually the clouds and lightening came closer to earth, and the downpour soaked. The morning dawned with a brilliant sun, blue skies, and a freshness in the air that can only be smelled after an April shower. There's a rhyme in there somewhere. 

    I worked in the yard this morning, and then spent much of the afternoon recovering emotionally and artistically from the specter of a kiln load of completely off-color pottery that I had fired yesterday. I know what happened, and when, but I'm not sure why. I hope I can learn from that mistake, and keep it under control next time. Once I let the depression of a month's work gone down the tubes go through my system, along with a nice little nap, I was able to get back into the studio and work on some pieces for the next kiln load. 

    I might be able to recover some of the work in another firing using a method that I had learned from a workshop from a decade ago, so that will be something to work on as I make more pots this week. I'll see if I can refire this kiln load, and get some of these pots in good order. I was really hoping to have some of the mini teapots that I had been working on, but the new ones I threw today may be even better than those!

    A cyclist that had passed by on his bike in the morning came back in the afternoon to buy some of my work! That was a nice pick-me-up after seeing the kiln. Thanks Tom!

Monday 10-04-2006 Tonight we had a wonderful discussion group on aesthetics in clay. It was triggered by a series of articles in Ceramics Monthly February issue, and we really went around the subject several times. It was fascinating to try to look at the concept of aesthetics from so many angles: visual results of techniques, the emotional connection that people make, the content, the material itself as aesthetic. It was an excellent dialogue between many points of view that eventually found a common rhythm of expression and understanding. 

    Today I made up some glazes, unloaded the bisque kiln, Joyce waxed ALL the pots, and I started putting the liners in some. The challenge is to leave some unglazed to try out the new orange glaze that I'll be testing in this kiln load. Then I started looking at my schedule and realized that I am going to have 4 shows in 5 weeks!!! I will be ready for a vacation by the end of that, but instead I'll be madly preparing for my art exchange with France. 

    This trip is coming together so well! A friend has contacted her friend in Paris as a possibility for guest accommodations while I am there. It would be so cool to have a native Parisian to show me around. I have also been talking to Jancy about her trip to Lucerne, Switzerland, and it sounds so idyllic! I am really looking forward to seeing the Alps, if I can. I'll have to see how the grants go, but people are being so generous, so far! It's looking good! The French is coming along, but I know I won't have a handle on it like I would like. I'll just be able to say a few phrases, and maybe understand a few. I'll have to count on those who have a little English to offer. This is going to be such a fabulous summer!

    Yesterday, I was taken to a fabulous little park in Cincinnati called Lindner Park. It is the McCullough Seed Company estate, and it had so many wonderful surprises! I has a lot of structures that look like they are from the turn of the 20th century, including a beautiful stone bridge that spans a creek that comes from a spring house right next to the house. All the structures are mad of stone, and the artistry of the stone masonry was so wonderful because it was not geometric! The walls undulate and bulge and spread out at the base. It was great affirmation for the way I am making a lot of my stone structures around my gardens, by ignoring the straight lines, and going for the biomorphic, the organic, which is what stone and gardens are, anyway. Even my arbor is going to be made of old trees and branches taken from the woods. I'll have some time to work on that this Friday, it looks like, and I am really looking forward to that. Life is art, and vice versa. 

Thursday 6-04-2006 Been over a week already. The time flies when we're having fun! I had a wonderful day today, though it seems that I didn't get that much work done. That's because I didn't get on the wheel. Plenty of other things to do. 
    Fired the kiln with a load of bisque, mixed up some new glazes to test. Made another set of face pitcher molds with a new design, which is really cool, I think. I love them. Yesterday I worked pretty long, I left the studio about 9:30 pm. I'm glad I finished it all, the trimming needed to be done at that point. I finished loading the kiln at 6, and then went to the duplex that I own to inspect after a tenant had vacated. I think I'm going to sell that property, it is just a big cloud hanging over me. So if it doesn't add to my happiness, then I think I should find another way to get along. Joy is my goal. And it doesn't come in huge dollar signs. I am living a dream. How many times have you heard that from me? Well, it's a lovely refrain, get used to it. 

    I have been focusing a lot on treating myself with loving kindness the last few days. It can sure make a difference when I start to beat myself up about something I didn't get done, or that I didn't do quite right. 

    Trying to remember some special moments to share with you, and the thing that comes to mind are my apprentices, and how much they help me to see my work, to really look, to think about what I'm doing. And all that time they thought I was talking about their work! There is a lot of good energy with that interaction. It's a great balance to the time I spend working in the studio by myself. It's taken me a while to get used to having others there while I work, but now I don't think I could do without it. I think I've learned a lot about myself and how I interact with professionals during the past two or three years, and I feel like I am more comfortable with myself in this context. 

Wednesday 29-03-2006 I threw some very small teapots yesterday, along with some functional teapots, and finished the minis today. Finished the very large pitchers, and finished the 24 inch tall jar. Started on some more funky teapots for France exhibit. Worked on more face pitcher molds. So much to do. 

Monday 27-03-2006 I felt particularly efficient in the studio today! I really got a lot done in a short amount of time, considering it was 11am before I got into the studio. The paperwork is non stop. But I immediately set to it with pulling some handles for a dozen mugs  and two casseroles. The plates I had made last week and trimmed had stored very well since Thursday when I wrapped them in damp newspaper and plastic. They were ideal for adding the curly additions. In the afternoon I finished the curly plates, put the handles on the mugs, trimmed the casseroles and attached their handles, and threw a couple over-sized pitchers. I want to have all sorts of sizes of each of these. I want to have the Alice in Wonderland thing going on with large, normal, and miniature of teapots and of pitchers. I hope to make some over-sized teapots tomorrow. That should about have me ready for the next kiln to fire. 

    At Fong Choo's workshop last weekend, he talked of throwing for 6 hours in a day and throwing 30 teapots. I realize that I could easily put out that much work if I didn't have to do anything else. But I also realize I need to get a real good rhythm going in the studio. I know that the thing that I want to do is make new work, so it takes real discipline to make work for orders. I'd like to replace the fear and guilt motivators with something more positive. 

    The evening was spent catching up on correspondence and updating one of my web sites. I feel like I am making progress in that area. Not so much procrastination. A little at a time. Next I can get started on the taxes!

Friday 24-3-06 Just spent the last hour walking around the Cherokee triangle park area of Louisville. This area was built around the turn of the century, and has some of the finest examples of residential architecture that you could ever see. One house after the other epitomizing the various styles from roman to Spanish to Tudor to Wright, to German, Italian, Colonial, Georgian - amazing! And all of it in exceptional condition, cut glass glimmering in the night, wrap around porches with such detail that the house is truly an example of the art in architecture.
I would turn corner after corner, wanting to take it all in, not wanting to miss a street, but after making so many turns I was beginning to lose my bearings. Makes me think I want to get a compass for France.
The workshop was invigorating and so affirming. It really confirmed the feedback I've been getting to specialize in one thing- teapots. It has worked for Fong, and it will work for me. People know me for my teapots, and I would love to make more of them. I can see how my work is going to change with this great liberation of ideas. It really isn't a matter of making things different, but to 'tweak' things, as Fong Choo says. I can see how I can take things much farther, and learn more about my own vocabulary. The picture is of the mask that I made at the workshop weekend on Saturday.

Tuesday, 21-03-2006 This spring morning finds a blanket of sleet and snow spread over the fields, and adding a slick spread of uncertainty over the roads. Our friend friction has been masked with icy film that renders our expectations of sure-footed travel wiped out and replaced with fear, gut wrenching, adrenalin pumping trepidation. 

    Not me. I'm sitting here with no need to whisk off to points of engagement. My engagement is 100 feet out the door and into my warm studio, to engage in a dialog with my organic clay. To engage in the creative process that miraculously produces fascinating and surprising work. The fear is that it would ever end. That is my demon. But it does feel like an uncontrolled slide sometimes when I start on a piece and just let the work do its thing. Suddenly I am looking at an object that I am not really sure where it came from. 

    Last week I was totally engrossed in art pieces like that. I had about five or six pieces going at the same time, slowly letting them evolve into what they will. The surprise is not so much what I'm doing, but what I end up with. I am completely amazed that I make what I make, that these fascinating pieces come from these hands and this mind. They are such gifts, I feel like bowing down to the creative gods, the art fairies, the muses, and thank them for occupying my hands for a few hours. 

    It is so amazing to see how much joy I get from making my art. At one point last week I was looking at a piece that was coming together, and my apprentice asked what I was doing or thinking. I said I am having so much fun with this, and she said she could see the joy in my face. My dream would to be to make all this art work all the time, hire someone to handle the business end, and just create! So I decided to follow Manet's footsteps and win the lottery. That's how he became an artist. I think that's a good model to follow. I also realize that the "lottery" could come in many forms! 

    The France Art Exchange is moving along at amazing pace. Last week I sent out a little flyer about my "Patron Program", and three people are interested in supporting me on my adventure! I am so excited to be receiving their support and to know people believe in me and my work. It is as valuable to me as a major grant from an art organization, because these are people who are willing to support the arts on a one-to-one level, to see an artist actually make a difference. Thank you!!!

    The participating artists in the Exchange met last Sunday, and the excitement is palpable. Suzanne has found artists for each of us to stay with in Nancy, and we will all be within walking distance of each other. Lots of activities will be planned, including a two day workshop. I am developing a similar workshop here in the US, and I think it is going to work out!

10-03-2006    Walking to the car, that familiar light surrounded me and made everything glow. The moon was starting toward full, and the stars were singing in harmony. Once I got home, stepping out of the car made me want to just step on down the road, looking up to see that great white night orb shining down. What a great ending to a great day.

    I spent the afternoon speaking to a group of 100 4th through 8th grade 4-H members, and teaching them how to make pottery. What a gift! It was so great to be around that barely-contained energy, to feel that joy of exploring something new, to find their own voice. I enjoyed the opportunity to affirm their creativity and tell them everything they made was wonderful. 

    And this after a morning in the studio making more exciting pieces for my France exchange. I get downright giddy when I get to work on this sculptural stuff. And my apprentices are putting out some really awesome work too, which gets me going even more. I get so energized with all this creativity going on in my studio. 

9-03-2006 What a fabulous day! I finally got in the studio and made some pots. Not just pots, but some art pots! I started on some new work for the France Art Exchange in June, and it was so much fun creating this wild stuff! Maybe tomorrow I'll take some pictures so you can see the work progress. 

    While I was working on it, I became so alive! It seemed like my whole body was vibrating, and my eyes were like THIS wide open! I was back in the zone, and it didn't matter how much time it took to do anything. I went back over and over on one form, until it was just where my imagination had lead me. It's times like these that I start to doubt my work the most, even though I know this is when it is most inspired. I wonder, as my imagination soars,  if anyone will like it, but my experience has shown me that my passion is the barometer, the compass, of the work's success and appeal. It can also be the most challenging work for those who are expecting a functional piece. But they have the greatest opportunity for learning, too. 

    I was so lost in the work, I was back in that place of not knowing if it was evening, morning, or afternoon, I didn't care that the cloud cover and rain had most people in a funk, I was in the sunniest spring meadow of my mind!!!! I am so eager to get back out there and continue the work, but I know those pieces won't be worked on until Monday because they won't be dry enough to continue on tomorrow, and Saturday I will be out of town volunteering for the Kentucky Guild.

    Tonight I went to the music "Guild", a group of guys who play guitar. They let me join in with my various instruments; harmonicas, drum, and "gut-bucket bass". I really enjoy it, and tonight was no exception. But my mind kept going back to the art-high that I was on when I was in the studio this afternoon! It was so good to be working and thinking that way. 

    Fumie was working on some challenging forms this morning, and she said she didn't want to do any more work because she had concentrated so hard on the work in the morning, and her head was tired. And I was thinking that I could have gone on forever with my work, I was actually energized by the ideas and the forms, and thinking about the glazing, and the way the work was coming together and inspiring more ideas! I wish everyone could experience this euphoria. Hell, I wish I didn't have to run the business, and I could spend everyday doing this! I am so very fortunate, blessed, lucky, and grateful as heaven. It's like my friend said, most people think of having enough as having twice what they have now. I've got a roof over my head, and I've got my art. I've got twice what I need, and more than I can ever use.

8-03-2006 Started off the day with a broken furnace. I thought about fixing it myself, but I realized how much time that would take. It took the professional a half day with driving back and forth for the parts and new motor. He wouldn't talk about how much it cost me, but I have a feeling it's going to be steep. But 17 years isn't bad for one furnace. 

    I got all the orders packed, invoiced, labeled and picked up by UPS! That's a relief, and I can move on to making pottery, maybe. Though there are a lot of administrative details to be attended to. I think I'll let Joyce make some follow up phone calls to some of the prospects, and Fumie and I will put the gallery back together. Maybe. Then I'd like to shoot a new set of slides for applying to shows, convert to digital, set up packets for the applications. It never ends. 

    I have been wait-listed for Summerfair in June! That's the only way I get in, it seems, and that's OK. As long as I get to do the show. It was best show ever when I did it in 2004. 

7-03-2006 I'm baaa-aaack! Last weekend I rented a space a the Kentucky Craft Market in Louisville, Kentucky for a combined wholesale/retail show. I did OK, but it wasn't the big weekend I had hoped for. It was disconcerting to see many artists doing very well, and I wasn't. Many of the other artists thought that my booth looked really good, but it didn't seem to draw the customers in. There are some things I would like to change back to the way I was doing things, but many are saying it looks great the way it is. The challenge is to do what works or to look "good". The work is the same, sometimes it's just a matter of presentation. 

    Yesterday I took the day off and just loafed. This is something I've learned to do for myself after a show. Ray was saying he thinks he needs at least two days to recover from a show like that one. At times it was actually challenging for me to just sit around and do nothing. I was surprised that I wasn't more fatigued, which is the usual case. I noticed that I wasn't as uptight about not selling everything this weekend, which can be a big factor in the level of exhaustion I experience after a show. I did a lot of self-care; yoga, tai-chi, qi-gong, meditation. It was great! So I was ready and rarin' to go today.

    I spent the morning sorting out the orders to send to the galleries and shops that have ordered from me in the past month. I started packing the orders, and ran out of packing tape. So in to Cincinnati I go to pick up tape and wrapping paper and some boxes, stop by the bank to deposit some checks. Got back and wrote up some invoices on Quickbooks, corresponded with some customers (Hi Jody and Susan!), and got ready for my book group.

    We're studying The Power of Wisdom, by Aman Motwane. The basis of the book is the recognition of the constant of duality in the world. Not just in the fact that there is black and white, pain and pleasure, joy and sadness; but there is also a duality in each of us that is complementary to ourselves, and to each other. And focusing on how each "non-strength" is as much a part of ourselves as the strengths, and of each person we meet and interact with, allows us to mesh with that non-strength and draw it out in the right situation. Cow manure may not be appropriate in certain places, but it sure is welcome in my flower gardens! It's just a matter of matching the facet of our character to the situation where it will shine, and, more importantly, recognizing the same in every one we meet.     

    Now, this concept is becoming visible to me in my work, and even in the field of ceramic art. I sometimes envy the work of another artist, or at least admire it, and wish I could do the same spectacular thing. But I have my own duality and my own strengths that, if I go where those strengths lead me, I can create work of equal magnitude. 

    A fellow artist was telling me about some of the other major artists at the show who are considered at the top of their game, some of the leaders in the field, and then he said that I am easily of the same caliber. That kind of blew me away. But yet I will trade with any up and coming artist if I am struck by their work. I don't see myself as being at the precipice of some mountain of accomplishment. Just like Mondrian in his seventies, I am just touching the tip of the iceberg. I am just learning. So much more to do. Maybe tomorrow I can get my hands back in the clay.

17-02-2006 Fired the last kiln for the Kentucky Craft Market. It went fairly well, but the bottom of the kiln was much cooler. But I'm sure it won't be over-reduced and dark! I kept a very close eye on the oxygen analyzer at the end of the firing. 

    I was interviewed on local cable Insight ICN 6 Morning magazine this morning, which was a nice bonus! I sent out email flyers on Friday, and Sandy shot an email back and asked if I would come in today. It was  very good interview, and I had a good time. Just before I went on, I stopped and remembered that I wanted to have a clear intention. The intention might not have been clear verbally, but I knew I wanted to go on the show and have fun, be genuinely excited, and be informative. I think it went very well.

    The usual panic before a show, though I feel like I am more prepared than usual at this point. Maybe I'm getting the hang of it. I keep thinking about last year's show when John said he had sold $11,000 wholesale and retail combined. That is such an affirmation that it can happen, and it can happen to me! At the time he told me, I felt good because people had rarely talked about their total for fear of feeling inferior if it was less than the listener, or feel bad if it was more because it might make the other feel inferior. But a couple years ago, after Mackey's Prosperity and Money class, I decided to talk about money. I think it has helped people open up about their prosperity, and we can all work at a collective consciousness of prosperity. 

23-02-2006 Stepping out of the studio as the sun blasts its way over the hilltops, the avian auditory feast beckons me to walk through the beauty that is my home. So i ignore the work, the deadline, the frantic call of the next art show, and I go for a walk with Rudy (who is oblivious to the exceptional scenes around us). 

    The rhime has been blanketed on everything in sight, a gossamer veil sprayed on the world with Cold's aerosol can of frost. The limelight's blaze on 

21-02-2006 Saturday was a full work day, getting the bisque ware glazed and loaded in the kiln. Once again, in the interest of expediency, I omitted working on some new glazes. Hopefully I will have them ready for this next firing. In my hurry and fatigue I forgot a piece of seal for the door of the kiln. This did not become apparent until more than halfway through the firing, and I'm afraid it did not bode well for the results. Looking in the peephole today, it was obvious that there was too much reduction. All of the green looks quite dark instead of the bright green that is my trademark. 

    At first I was quite despondent and anxious about it through most of the morning, but at some point I was able to accept it and realize that I may have some options. I recalled reading some notes from a workshop probably a decade ago that mentioned a method for reglazing po*ts that have already been fired. The problem with attempting reglazing is that the glaze has no open pores to absorb the water. Without the open pores, the glaze just runs off the impervious surface, and there is not enough new glaze to produce any effect in the next firing. 

    But the tip from the workshop actually worked on a test pot! So now I have an option to reclaim a full kiln load of work that would otherwise be lost. It felt really good to be proactive and actually find a solution, a solution that was already at my fingertips! Isn't this a wonderful universe?!

    This means I won't have another kiln load to take to the show, because tomorrow I will be unloading the glaze firing and reloading with another smaller bisque firing that will be unloaded on Friday. So that leaves Friday and Saturday for glazing and loading the kiln, and firing only one kiln load before I leave on Thursday. This also means I won't have the Teapot set that the Craft Market wanted for the Designer Showcase. Like this hasn't happened to them before. D'oh!

    The acceptance of the bad kiln pointed out something that I read this evening. In realizing that we live in a world of Duality, a world of dark and light, pain and pleasure, etc., our unhappiness comes from trying to make it all one way. All good. All happy. But without the other, we have no idea what "good" is good about. So when I accepted the "bad" kiln load, I was dealing with the reality of my world, and allowing it to motivate me to something else. My friend Ray pointed out that this may lead to a whole new effect! That's what art is all about; making enough mistakes to find something to keep! Can't wait to see what I create next.

14-02-02006 After reading some articles in Ceramics Monthly last week that carried discourses on the aesthetics of art and craft, I decided to ask members of the Clay Alliance if they would like to join me in a discussion of the topics. Last night six of us assembled for a great evening talking about the issues and challenges that we face as craft artists and artisans. 

    When I got home, I decided to watch some of the movie I had gotten from the library, and ended up transfixed to the screen for the duration. The movie was a biography of a very talented, and somewhat tortured, pianist who eventually overcomes a controlling father and other challenges to find great joy in his talent. I was surprised at how mesmerized I was by watching him play and the true competition that can develop for the young students of music. The name of the movie is Shine, and maybe you would like it, too. 

    The work day was spent making some bowl molds, finishing some pitchers, and, of course, the paper work. Once again, hard to believe a single sentence can sum up a day's work. 

9-02-06 The Collection

Pulling up into the driveway of the comfortable ranch in a well-established Cincinnati neighborhood, I could tell by the large and funky teapot in the bay window that I was in for a treat.

            In October at the Hyde Park Art Show, one of my customers, a soft spoken couple obviously well educated and well traveled, segued into a discussion about their ceramic art collection that they had been acquiring since the 1970’s and longer. He impressed upon me that there were names that I would recognize, founding fathers, per se. As we talked further he decided to get on my email list for future shows, and suggested that I might like to come by and see the collection in person.

            I could see that they would delight in my immersion in a delectable sensual and aesthetic delight. After a few emails, the invitation specified a date in January that I looked forward to. Little did I know exactly how intoxicating that afternoon would be.

            The teapot in the window turned out to be Curtis Hoard, and was just the tip of the iceberg. Standing in the living room, the pieces I could recognize practically glowed with their historical significance, and provided the unparalleled experience that each of these works could only provide mano a mano, in person. “Pictures don’t do it justice” is more than a cliché when it comes to the major ceramics of our time.

            “We’ll start in here,” he began, and handed me a Ruth Duckworth, and then a Beatrice Wood vase. I was finding it hard to breathe already, having spied the Wayne Higby in the corner. “The major pieces are upstairs,” he said, “we’ll finish up there.” By the time we hit the steps, I was floating above the risers.

            The collectors had long ago decided to focus on American contemporary ceramic art. Their treasures had come from some of the major shows in Chicago and New York, and at established galleries across the country, from New York to California, and a few pieces, like the Ken Ferguson shino basket from The Private Collection that had been in a downtown Cincinnati hotel until the late 90’s. As a matter of fact, they had the week before brought back from California a Warren Mackenzie after talking to Warren on the phone about his work. Both pieces were examples of shino, Ken’s much more reduced and orange than this particular Mackenzie, a dropped lip bowl for which he is well known.

            The Wayne Higby was in the corner, near in age to my guess of the late 70’s, a large ovoid jar with flowers in colors that would evolve into his signature landscape green and brown and copper raku glazes. Unable to control myself, I began describing some of the techniques and materials the artists used as he handed me each piece, and the collector began writing notes in his provenance binder.

            Paula Winokur was on the coffee table, and they spoke of their surprise at finding discarded drinks resting in the porcelain tray-like artwork. I recalled her work vividly in a Ceramics Monthly article form circa 1990, and told them how each of the elements, timid on this piece, had taken on a subtle yet clear character through her career.

            In the dining room I was handed a few David Leach pieces, some of which had been cracked in use. The collectors made a point of telling me that these pots were given them, they weren’t purchased.

            Stepping into the display room upstairs I was once again breathless, my jaw dropped, I wanted to scream and jump, but I didn’t dare move a muscle. I was standing in the presence of Norman Schulman, Edward Eberle, John Glick, Ted Randal, Donna Polseno, Don Reitz, Peter Voulkos,  Bennett Bean, Paul Soldner. Of particular note was the Richard Shaw trompe l'oeil tableau of a paper cup masking-taped to a green stem, with a torn playing card, every bit of which was ceramic.

In their enthusiasm, without my asking, they handed me almost every piece in the collection. Resting in my hands, one at a time, I held some of the finest ceramic art our country has ever seen, and the moment was not lost on me.

My ceramic mind would not shut up, exploring every technique in exquisite detail, work so well executed as to make the technique totally subservient to the intent and expression of the artist. Handling their work, I almost felt like I was in the room when they were making that piece. I could see the artist pushing their fingers through the clay, pouring the glaze over the slip, softening the facet with a sponge, firing the iron red with that all-important oxidation at the end before shutting down the kiln.

Climbing into my car, after a fond farewell and repeated expression of my gratitude, I looked again at the teapot in the bay window. My mind had been squeezed through every pore of clay, drawn across every texture and glaze, swam in every vessel’s volume. I floated home on a cloud of ceramic art and  history, memories of pottery’s pinnacles and professionals. What a gift.

6:00pm    Quite productive today, but the to-do list is still stretching from Here to Eternity. Is that what that movie was about? Maybe I'll produce a remake. Give it a contemporary twist.

Finished some mini-teapots, poured the molds on face mini-teapots, started molds for salt & pepper shakers and mugs, remade the bowls for the face bowls, since I didn't cover the ones I made last night and they dried out. Seems like a lot of work that can be summed up in one sentence. 

Put together a discussion group on the art and aesthetics of craft that I'll moderate this Monday. Looking forward to that discussion, with topics of function versus art, archetypes of craft and function, value mandated by the collector, etc. 

8:30am Walking by a window, I catch my breath and stop in my tracks. The sun's magical wand had transformed the simple field into a diamond crusted sea of orange and blue and white, a visual ménage a trois, showing me that nature knows the color wheel  better than I. The golden hue of winter grasses and dormant butterfly plants catch the brilliant morning sun raking across the highlights, giving full contrast to the sky blue reflection on snow settled in the shadows of the valleys and dips. Mini-mounds of snow barely peek over the tufts of grass, warmed enough by the sun to melt and prism the light, glimmering like jewels casually scattered in the field. 

6-02-06 Bonsoir, mon ami! I spent most of the day working on grant applications for corporate sponsorship for the art exchange with Nancy, France. Tomorrow I'll run one of the proposals up to my local bank. This trip is going to cost in excess of $3000, and I'm afraid it isn't going to happen without some generosity from some people who would love to support the project. And if that includes you, please shoot me an email at larry@watsonclay.com right away! I'll be sending out an email with more information about that to those who are already on my email list pretty soon. I'll also be offering artwork to be made on my return that you can invest in now at a discounted price! The deal is, you pay $300 now for a piece that I'll make when I return worth $400 to $600. 

I worked on some miniature teapots this afternoon, and making the spouts and lids for them this evening, I found myself making more than twice as many spouts than I need! I was looking for something, plus I was playing with some new ideas on how the spout could be altered at the lip, how it could be longer or shorter or smaller. When I was making them smaller, I couldn't make them small enough! Well, I'm sure I have some that will work when I put them together tomorrow.  That will take a good part of the day. 

I was able to pour half of the molds on the mini "face" teapots, and get them partially prepped for the second half, which I'll let Fumie finish tomorrow. I am excited about the whole line, and I got an order from one of my regular customers and they included a lot of the face line, so that feels like some affirmation that I am on the right track. They called me the day they got their new price list, so I think it scored a good reaction. By the time I go to New York in August, I'll be looking for more help in the studio!

I read some fascinating articles on the aesthetics of craft and clay in the latest Ceramics Monthly tonight, and I plan on inviting a group from the Clay Alliance to a discussion of some of the ideas in these articles. They are very pertinent to the whole field of craft as art. 

Thought for the Day:

. . . . the intelligent mind thinks in contrasts; then it sees the underlying identity in contrasts. Shakespeare and Al Capone are different in many ways. They are also identical in many ways. In every man there is the saint and the sinner, the rattlesnake and the monkey, God and the devil. Accidents of environment bring out these identical and contrasted elements. Murder, rape, and suicide live in each one of us. The intelligent mind sees homogeneity in heterogeneity. Caviar and cabbage differ only in the arrangement of electrons. ~Melvin B. Tolson (b. February 6, 1898 – d. August 29, 1966), From Caviar and Cabbage: Selected Columns by Melvin B. Tolson from the Washington Tribune, 1937-1944

1-02-06 10:24 am A good part of yesterday was spent in a meeting that had little if anything to do with the business, but it was fun to see Barry, Mackey, and Debbie, and to help them connect on their project. Sometimes the best work seems so unrelated. I was able to get some paper work done in the evening, threw some teapots in the afternoon. I found myself wanting to work into the night, but I finally stopped about 9:30. It really paid off, I was in the studio at 8:00! Some potters get working at 7:00, like my apprentice Joyce, and well, that works for them. No sense in fighting my body, but the guilt is a challenge to release. Yeah, ya know, people who don't start early are considered lazy. Looking at my days, I find it hard to characterize them as lazy. Oh yeah, more paperwork to do! 

31-01-06 What a great collection! I was actually handling work of some of the founders and movers of the ceramic world: Paul Soldner, Peter Voulkos, Don Reitz, John Glick, Warren McKenzie, Ken Ferguson, Wayne Higby, Donna Polseno, Beatrice Wood, Paul Whittaker, Bennett Bean, . . .  I was so enthralled, but the collectors were as fascinated with my impromptu class on techniques and materials. It was a well spent afternoon!

31-01-06 Wow! Someone had written me and asked if I was Ok since I had not made an entry here for a while, and I had no idea that it had been so long! I think about it almost daily, but the time slips away. I was selected for an art exchange with Nancy, France, my step-father made his transition, I'm trying to get my wholesale price lists out to my clients, preparing a new body of work for the Craft Market in March, helping my Mom with a lot of stuff, meetings, - where is the time to make pots!!!!

Working on some molds of face mugs today, assembling the packet for my wholesale clients, and this afternoon I have been invited to see a collection of a Cincinnati couple who have been acquiring nationally known clay artists' work for decades. I am very excited to see this work! It's a half a day off, but I know it will be worth it to see this work in person. Can't wait to tell you about it!

Yesterday I spent the morning with paper work and filling out forms, and I was able to trim some plates and bowls in the afternoon. I made the first half of the mug molds yesterday, and spent the evening getting the envelopes to print on my new printer for the mailing. It's amazing that I have a new computer and a new printer that seem actually slower than my old ones! What's up with that? It seems to me so self indulgent of the computer software writers to make the programs so complex that the hardware can't handle the work without bogging down. 

OK, hope it's not so long till the next entry. I enjoy this too much.

7-01-06 The rest of the week has seen me in the studio less than I would like. I am so anxious to be working in clay, and other things are taking priority. A family health emergency took a couple days, and so the first week of the year was a slight delay in my mental schedule. Time to regroup and punt. 

A new apprentice has started, and it's great to feel the energy of teaching again. It is a lot of fun to explore the design and technical aspects of clay with a fellow artist. I have a feeling that this will be a constant for me for some time to come. Maybe permanently! 
    Today is starting out quite beautiful, with plenty of sunshine, a breeze bringing the few tufts of dormant grass to life, waving at the sun.

4-01-06 It seemed like it had been years since I walked down this road in the dark of night, with a cold January wind adding a brisk note to our little hike. Rudy and I were trying out our "running lights" for the first time, feeling a rush from our new found freedom of extended walking hours, no longer limited to the confines of daylight. I used to walk this road regularly at night, unconcerned with visibility since there was so little traffic on this road back then, when the only house I passed was the stone house built in the 19th century, and the only living soul I would run into were the horses waiting at the fence for a friendly voice and a pat on the neck. 

That was 15 years ago, and Terry was the canine companion at the time. It also predated the local Wal Mart strip mall, and its accompanying mega-lumens of parking lot lights, street lights, and the night sky's glow in the west from that conflagration of merchandising. Tonight, as I amble down the road with that glow to my back, I am blinded by a neighbor's street light attached to the porch. I always wonder if the purpose of streetlights in the yard is intended to drive off burglars or boogey men. I ask that rhetorically. I already have the answer. 

A half mile further, another house has erected its sentinels of illumination. Yes, not just one street lamp planted in the front yard, but two street lamps, sure to chase away the depth of night from their permanent post. I look at the house in that ghostly glow, the bricks of daylight red taking on a chalky pallor, all painted trim simple grays, stark and flat in artificial relief.

I strike up a conversation with these neighbors, in my head, and ask them if they realize what they are shoving out of their yards when they blast their bullhorns of light into the night air? With so much visual glare and white noise, how can you hear the gurgle of the creek in its endless stream, the timelessness of night accentuating its tireless cataract. Or what about the insects and frogs and crickets that fill the night air in summer, all the more clear and melodious in the absence of retina stimuli? 

In that first year of night walks, it wasn't until a dozen or so that I was able to hear all these noises as I paused to greet the horses. As all the sounds followed the night conductor in their measureless symphony, I thought, "So this is what the horses hear!"

2-01-06    As I'm writing this, Rudy is snuggling up to a large red balloon, which he had spent a good half hour barking at the other day when I blew it up and set it on the floor. I guess the balloon's nature to roll easily gives it a non-threatening animation that endears Rudy to it. OK, so who knows what he is thinking, but he looks cute laying on the floor next to a balloon. Well, now he is playing with the balloon, nosing it around the room and pawing at it. I wonder if he'll eventually get so familiar with it that he pops it with a claw. Oh, what a surprised and disappointed dog that will be!

Happy New Year! I was in the studio most of the day, and loving every minute of it! I think the December rest has done its job, and I am really reinvigorated to be creating in clay again. It was great, it seemed like there was nothing that seemed tedious, and I was having a blast with every little detail, every piece of clay, and even the plaster was fun.

I continued developing ideas for the face line of pottery, finishing up some salt & pepper shakers, throwing more cookie jars, and making molds of the bowls and plates I trimmed today. Occasionally I would be tempted to take a break and go to the computer or the couch, but then I would find something else to do, one more thing, and an hour later I was still engrossed in the process! I am so fortunate! 

An order for the face line came in last week from WholesaleCrafts.com, which is a great affirmation about the work I am doing. As usual, it seems to take the market a few months to catch on to what I am doing, whether its a new color, or a new design. That seems to work out alright because it can take that long for me to resolve and flesh out the idea. Ideas don't always come neatly packaged with all elements completely resolved. It takes a lot of experimenting and lots of mistakes before the design feels right. So any work you see, including other artists' work, is just the culmination of many ideas and experiments and trials before the item you are looking at came into being. And that is just the beginning, because each resolved idea leaves room for more ideas to bubble up. This is a great way to live.

I decided to get something to eat at 5:00 and realized that I could take Rudy for a walk at that point, before it got dark. But as we left, it seemed that dusk was making an early curtain call, and the explanation was in the southern sky and a wall of dark clouds portentous of the rain forecast on the radio. The unexpected warmth of a near record January day was a little disorienting, betraying the season and the cycle of cold that would normally be gripping us, and would soon return. January rarely disappoints for all 30 days. 

A brisk pace seemed warranted, hastened by the impending storm, but the creek drew me in, as I contemplated the fact that all the good patio stones would be washed down stream with the rising water. Spying an especially choice rock that seemed large enough to serve as a table, I crossed the creek to move it out of the stream. But, alas, the stone was too formidable, and I chose to recognize my limitations and set it tenderly down, walking away with lustful backward glances. Rudy had gone ahead, not all that patient when it came to my rock fondling. So as I tried to catch up to him, the first rumbles of thunder rolled in from the southwest, and it goosed my steps a bit, focused my mind, you could say. We made it back before the rains started, and it wasn't until I was in the throws of cooking that I heard the hiss of rain on the tin porch roof drowning out the radio. Stepping out on the porch, I felt a real sense of welcome to the rain, a simple joy in seeing nature do what it does. Especially when I am warm and dry. And fed. Aaaahh.

23-12-05    A subtle shift has occurred, a sense of rightness and clarity, totally impalpable, inexplicable. It feels like this entire month of intentional inertia has finally taken its toll, and I have slowed down to my pace. I have taken a breath, a deep cleansing breath, and I have slowed down from the pressure of running my own business, with all the projects and ideas pushing against me, poking me in the ribs to get a move on, to fit more into the day than is physically possible, and in the impossibility of it all even less got done than was reasonably expected. It seemed. So now I have slowed down to the pace of my mind and my breath, the hurried moving sidewalk dumped me off onto the static concrete, and I have finally found my own steps again. 

Even talking about it gets my chest tightening up, my breath shallow and quick, to think about that pace that is was the norm. Oh how I hope I can find my own sensibilities every day, that I can settle into my own skin and find a way to carry that into all my work and play. It feels like, since I have found my own legs, I can then move out into the world with more stability and consciousness about what I am doing and how. To take stock of each task, to step into it, and, just as consciously, step out of it before going into the next. 

I actually did that a few times today, and it felt so clean. I finished reading an article in a magazine, and, instead of rushing to find another article to read in order to justify my lying on the couch, I closed my eyes and imagined some of the imagery that the author had painted in my head. It floated in effervescent colors, fluttered by a breeze, dabbed with an impressionist's paintbrush. And gently it dissolved in peace, in its own time. In my own time. 

It whirls in the back of my head, coming around to the movie screen to play it's catchy tune, this idea that part of my "clear" (arguable for some readers, considering the abstract nature of this pen) thinking might be partly attributable to the 40 hour fast that was completed this afternoon. I could feel the toxins wringing themselves from my body through the hours, wide swings between hyper clarity and dull lethargy. And at fast's end, the food becomes so precious and rich, the flavors swelling in Technicolor, a renewed satisfaction in the knowledge that there's more where that came from.

A dear friend asked today if I had any New Year's resolutions, and I said I don't seem to go in for that. But it does seem like ideas have been gestating all year to find themselves at the same starting line as the following year. But I think I finally hit on a most excellent resolution, one that will bring me great joy, a sense of peace in the panic, a calm in the storm of all I desire. This is a worthy intention to hold in my imagination, one that I think will create such a wonderful day. The only day; the one in which I am.